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3 Excellent Ways to use Creativity and Education to Bond with Your Kids After Separation

Bond with your kids after separation

In cases of separation, what the majority of parents are concerned about is the wellbeing of their children and how the entire situation might affect them. Most children find it confusing that their parents live in different places and they have two homes now, not to mention that they don’t have daily contact with one of their parents anymore. In addition, they sometimes have to adjust to new surroundings, new school and sometimes even their parents’ new partners. Fortunately, kids are able to bounce back and they can do so more quickly if you, as a parent, put some effort into helping them cope. One of the ways to do that is to strengthen the bonds between you and your children. Here are some ideas on how to do exactly that through educating children and inspiring them to be more creative.

Read with them

There aren’t many things in this amazing world that can spark a child’s imagination like an interesting story. Those parents who want to take advantage of this in order to bond with their children, brighten their thoughts and stimulate their intellect should turn to books. First, have your children see you read, as they’ll be more prone to do it themselves that way. Then, when they start showing interest in books, either read to them or, if they’re old enough, find books they can read themselves. Just the act of sitting in the same room and doing the same thing will make you feel closer to each other, as will talking about what you’ve read and perhaps even doing a role play based on the stories from their favorite books. The best part is that, when you talk about the books and how the characters behave and feel, you’ll actually gain a lot of insight into your children’s thoughts, wishes and fears, which is invaluable. Plus, once you instill love for reading in them, it’s more likely they’ll thrive at school and take pleasure in their classes and assignments when they’re older.

Play with them

Another great way to find out if there’s something bothering your child, develop a better relationship with them and boost their creativity is through play. All kids love games and they’ll simply adore the ones they get to play with you. Usually, there’s nothing children want more than for their parents and other adults in their life to play with them, but they don’t get the chance to do that often enough, due to their parents’ daily obligations. This is why you should also make sure they’re in safe hands when you’re not around. For instance, in Sydney, Australia, where divorce rates are quite high, parents seek the best child care Waterloo and other areas can offer, opting for educational centers with an inclusive approach and professional and dedicated staff. So, you should also find a place that promotes acceptance and encouragement for all children and where each child is given the attention they need. That way, whether your children are at home with you, or you put them into daycare, you’ll know that their emotional needs are being met through play and other enjoyable activities. And when they get home, you can play some of the games together and they can share their delight with you.

Practice a new language with them

If there’s one thing that your children can take pleasure in and which can also give them an advantage later in life is learning a new language. While finding an adequate language course or a private tutor is recommended, why not practice with them in the meantime, too? If you think that this is a good time for them to learn a second language, help your children with it by singing songs in that language, showing them flashcards or simply pointing to different objects and asking your kids to name them. If you’re fluent enough, you can even talk to them in the language. After all, children can and should learn outside the classroom as much as they do inside it. Not only will you make it amusing for your child and have them learn something new, but you can also bond with them greatly through such types of activities. The key is to always make it rewarding and entertaining for them and you’ll see how they soak in knowledge and how your connection becomes stronger and more profound.

The relationships between children and their parents play a crucial part in forming the kind of person those children will grow up to be. This is even more significant when your children are forced to go through your separation with you, so let the tips above guide you as you devote all your free time and all of your good will to bonding with your little ones.

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The Difference Between Authoritative Parenting and Authoritarian Parenting

Authoritative parenting

Authoritative and authoritarian parenting might sound like the same thing. In truth, they are quite different. They involve different approaches to behavior and vary in their level of success.

How do these parenting strategies differ? How do they affect your child’s development? Which one is better and how can you implement it into your household? 

Read on to find out everything you need to know about authoritarian and authoritative parenting. 

What Is Authoritarian Parenting?

Authoritarian parenting tends to follow an older school of thought. Built upon the foundations of children being seen and not heard, it utilizes phrasing like, “because I said so.” 

This parenting style is characterized by a lack of positive reinforcement and encouragement. Authoritarian parenting strategies involve strict rules and high expectations. At the same time, they fail at providing children with the resources and support required to succeed. 

A child’s inability to listen or behave is quickly followed by severe consequences. In a way, the child was set up for failure, then punished for their lack of success. Shame, embarrassment, and guilt are common themes, along with a general sense of disapproval. 

What Is Authoritative Parenting?

Authoritative parenting does not shy away from high expectations. In fact, setting clear goals is a large part of authoritative parenting. It revolves around the idea of building your child up to help them succeed while maintaining reasonable boundaries.

This parenting style includes sensitivity, positive reinforcement, and transparency. It involves explaining the reasoning behind decisions and rules. It utilizes open communication and encourages discussion. 

Authoritative parents take time to listen to and acknowledge their children. They do not act dismissive or demeaning, even when the child’s views or opinions seem unfounded or “out of line.” It is not a quick-fix solution for behavioral issues and requires both patience and time. 

Key Differences Between Authoritarian and Authoritative Parenting

In both authoritarian and authoritative parenting, it is the parents who should be setting the limits and enforcing rules. The difference lies in how this is accomplished. 

Parental Attitude

Authoritarian parenting is unresponsive and cold in nature. Parents address emotion as a weakness and resort to punishment or criticism when their child is struggling. 

Authoritative parents, on the other hand, are warm and responsive. By approaching their children in this manner, they can foster positive attachments. This is often associated with higher levels of confidence. 

Authoritative parenting means exerting control over your own emotions to avoid conflict escalation. Rather than reprimanding children for outbursts, parents start calm and constructive discussions. Studies show that kids who grow up in a supportive environment tend to be happier and exhibit more positive behaviors. 

Rules

Authoritative and authoritarian parenting styles are similar in one way. They both have high expectations and strict rules. The difference lies in rule enforcement.  

Authoritarian parents do not allow their children to ask questions. They expect children to follow rules in compliant silence.

This attitude often causes children to be anxious and insecure. It can also lead to misunderstandings when rules are not entirely clear.  

Authoritative parenting involves a warm and nurturing approach. Parents explain rules in detail and support them with reasons. Authoritative parenting encourages children to ask questions if they don’t understand or agree.

In turn, children learn to think critically, communicate with confidence, and feel included. 

Discipline 

Authoritative parenting involves holistic consequences, such as computer restrictions or limited activity. Authoritarian parenting often resorts to demeaning or harsh punishment. Parents exert more control over their children but are less effective in their follow-through.

On the other hand, authoritative parents often set higher standards. They are more consistent when following through with discipline. They use inductive discipline, which encourages their child’s prosocial behavior and empathy. 

Communication

Parents who default to an authoritarian strategy often lose control of their emotions. They may resort to yelling, name-calling, or scolding to achieve order and control. Communication is unidirectional, with the parent doing the speaking and the child remaining silent.

Authoritative parents often set their emotions aside. They look at each situation as a learning opportunity. These parents encourage open discussion, which helps their children feel supported and included. 

Control 

Authoritarian parents try to over-control or micromanage their children. Control over behavior is often not enough. They need to have emotional control as well to feel secure in their parental role.

This parenting style is like a dictatorship in that it relies on fear. It is a one-way street. Whatever the parent says is right and should be listened to and believed without question or protest. 

This is different from authoritative parenting, where standards remain high, but children have leeway to make their own choices and mistakes. Control is not the ultimate goal. Parents focus on fostering independence and the ability to self-regulate, only offering corrections when necessary.  

Authoritarian vs. Authoritative: Effects on Children

Authoritarian parents tend to be less involved in their children’s lives. They set expectations and wait for them to be followed with obedience. This has the potential to backfire in more ways than one. 

Children raised under authoritarian parenting tend to be insecure and self-deprecating. They are prone to bullying, disruptive behaviors in school, and depression. Some find academic success, but in general, their performance is lacking. 

Children with authoritative parents often achieve higher grades and success at school. This is likely because parent involvement correlates with higher performance. 

Kids with authoritative parents also tend to have better self-esteem and mental health. They show high levels of resilience, picking themselves up with ease after a setback. These kids are better able to self-regulate and make decisions independent of their parents’ influence.  

Which Parenting Strategy Is Better? 

Many studies support authoritative parenting as the more effective parenting strategy. Children raised under an authoritarian thumb are more likely to have mental-health issues and poor peer relations. 

But if authoritarian parenting is so counterproductive, why do some parents still resort to it? 

The answer is that old habits die hard. People raised by authoritarian parents often fall into the habits they picked up from their parents.

Another reason is that authoritarian parenting feels easier. Losing your temper is simple, but maintaining control when you’re frustrated takes practice. Even parents raised in an authoritative household can struggle.

The fact of the matter is no one is perfect. We all make mistakes or lose our temper from time to time. The important thing is to recognize those mistakes when they happen.

Learn from your errors and be transparent about them with your children. Not only does this set a good example, but it encourages attachment behaviors and positive relationships.   

Tips for Authoritative Parenting

You might be new to the authoritative parenting style. Perhaps you have been practicing it for years. Wherever you are in your parenting journey, these tips will help take your strategy to the next level. 

Listen

Take time to listen to your child. Don’t ask how their day went, then start checking emails on your phone. Remain engaged.

What your child has to say may not always seem important to you. To them, it might feel like a matter of life and death. Staying connected and attentive makes them feel heard and appreciated.

Validate 

Children are not born with a complete vocabulary and understanding of their emotions. It is your job to help them recognize their feelings, name them, and understand their connection to behavior. 

Acknowledge that whatever they are experiencing is acceptable. Avoid saying things like, “stop crying,” or “don’t be a baby.” These are very invalidating statements that leave them feeling vulnerable and insecure. 

Instead, focus on the behaviors, not the feelings. Being angry is okay and normal. Hitting, kicking, and biting, however, are not acceptable.

Make sure you discuss the difference with your kids. 

Be Clear

Some rules are non-negotiable. These might be age-restricted rules, they might be educational, or perhaps they are family-wide rules. The important thing is to be clear about why these rules are in place.

“Don’t stick your finger in the light socket.”

To an adult, this is a reasonable and logical rule, but to a child, it’s like telling them they can’t open a new present. So, give them a reason. Even if they don’t understand that electrocution can kill, it will hold more weight than a generic, “because I said so.” 

Use the One-Warning System

When you are straightforward with your children, then there is no room for doubt about expectations. So, consequences should also come as no surprise.

Be careful not to leap to serious punishment, especially for minor infractions like not doing their housework on time. Instead, start with a clear warning. “If you don’t take the trash out before dinner, then you won’t get to play Minecraft with your friends later.” 

Not only have you reiterated the expectation, but you have established a tangible consequence. Now, you must follow through.

If your child fails to take the trash out, then you should not let the occasion slide. This teaches them that your words are hollow. In the future, they are less likely to listen, and you are less likely to remain calm and understanding. 

Offer Incentives

Incentives are excellent for encouraging motivation. These can be anything from a sticker for doing their chores to money put towards a family road trip fund. 

Incentives, however, are two-sided. If your child fails to hold up their end of the bargain, then you can’t give in to their crocodile tears and tantrums. On the flip side, if they do follow through, you better deliver on your end of the bargain.

Whenever you use incentives in authoritative parenting, be sure the expectations are realistic for all parties involved.  

Allow Choices and Encourage Self-Regulation 

If you decide everything for your child, they might struggle to make their own choices later in life. Even little things like, “do you want cereal or toast,” teach them to think for themselves. 

This can also be used when it comes to discipline and behavior management. Encourage your children to find ways to manage their emotions, such as going for a walk or taking deep breaths. 

Encouraging self-regulation makes your child more independent. Instead of scolding them for forgetting to do something, make a checklist or schedule to help them remember. Have them run through the list each day and reward them for their consistency. 

Focus on What You Can Do

Co-parenting with no communication, or with minimal communication, is extremely challenging. It is important to accept that you won’t always have control over what happens when your child is away.

Even when parents stay happily married, there are many times when discipline is out of your hands. When your child goes to school or over to a friend’s house, you must relinquish control. 

Don’t lose your nerve and give up on being a better authoritative parent just because your ex-spouse is uncooperative. Even having one authoritative household in their life will help improve your child’s well-being and set them up for success. 

Maintain Healthy Relationships

You are not here to be your child’s best friend. They don’t always have to like you or even listen to you. However, that doesn’t mean you can’t have a positive and healthy relationship with your kids. 

Being an authoritative parent is about setting a good example and following through with expectations. It involves showing love, affection, and support. By setting clear boundaries and treating your child with respect, you will help them be a more successful and happy human. 

One Day at a Time

Authoritarian parenting is all about control, dominance, and silence. It can leave children feeling inadequate, insecure, and depressed. Authoritative parenting is a better style to implement in your home. 

Children raised with an authoritative parent are more successful in school and life. Foster a good and healthy relationship with your children. Set clear boundaries, practice listening, and be supportive. 

Establishing consistent rules and parenting styles can be difficult when you are divorced. At 2houses, we help separated parents work together to enhance their children’s well-being. Click here to learn more about how 2houses can help your family. 

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A Co-Parenting Guide on What the 70/30 Custody Schedule Looks Like

70/30 custody schedule

Every separated parent worries about the best method to co-parenting. But what’s the best way to manage your joint custody schedule?

The 70/30 custody schedule is a popular method for many reasons, including the fact that it allows parents to have one main home base for their children. It also works well when one parent lives farther away.

If you’re considering your ideal co-parenting schedule, the 70/30 custody schedule might be best for you! What does it entail? Keep reading to learn more in this guide.

What Is the 70/30 Custody Schedule and Why Is It So Popular?

This child custody schedule allows a child to spend 70% of their time staying with one parent. The child then spends 30% of their time with the other parent, and both adults are able to be involved with their child’s life and time.

Since one parent will spend more time with their child, this schedule usually works best if parents live far from each other. This way, you can limit the number of transitions for your child from one person’s home to another.

This schedule might also be best if you have one parent who is busier than the other. This might be because one parent has a more demanding work life, or because they are traveling more often. The parent with the consistent home base and who has 70% of their child’s time at their home is considered the “primary” parent.

Developing the right schedule that works for your family can be a difficult process, but it doesn’t have to be a negative experience! When two parents are committed to finding a schedule that will give their child the best of a consistent and happy lifestyle, the logistics become just another detail to sort out.

How Many Overnights Can You Expect?

One important logistic for both parents and for their child is the amount of overnights they can expect with the 70/30 joint schedule.

This schedule works out to 4 overnights for the non-primary parent. This ends up being more time than the “every other weekend” schedule.

There are several common schedules that can be used to work out a 70/30 custody arrangement. However, there are several important factors to consider when choosing which schedule will work best for you and your family.

Factors to Consider When Choosing a Schedule

The first factor to discuss with your co-parent is consistency. What is the best method for making sure your child has a consistent home life? At the same time, how can both parents have a consistent schedule for their work and individual lives?

Another discussion you may want to have with your co-parent is about hand-offs and general communication. It’s so important for separated parents to be able to discuss the best methods of handing off their children for an easier and happier time.

You might also want to discuss your child’s routine. Does your co-parenting schedule fit with your child’s other life routines, like day-care or sports?

More importantly, your child will be spending time away from each parent, so it’s important to factor this into your schedule when deciding how to split up their time.

Common Schedules For Sharing Time

The 70/30 parenting schedule can be set up in several ways. There are four common methods for this schedule, including the every weekend schedule, a 5-2 alternate weekend schedule, a third week schedule, and a schedule for every third day.

Keep reading for a full breakdown of what each of these schedules entails.

The Every Weekend Schedule

This schedule would allow the primary parent to have weekdays while the other parent has weekends. This does leave the non-primary parent with less time, but the every weekend schedule does allow for a lot of consistency.

Also, depending on the child’s age, they might be in school during the week. Handing off the child every weekend helps to not break up the school schedule.

This is also a helpful schedule because the non-primary parent might have more time with the child on the weekends since they don’t have to be in school. This can help make up for the time difference.

The every weekend schedule also works for families with one parent that works or travels on the weekends, but it certainly isn’t the only option.

5-2 Alternate Weekend Schedule

Another method of working out a 70/30 custody schedule is with a more flexible version of the weekend schedule. This is a great option if both parents are hoping to spend time with their children over the weekends, or if one parent is hoping to have some free weekends.

A 5-2 alternate weekend schedule means that you start on any day of the week and five nights are with the primary parent and two nights are with the other parent.

This schedule will depend on what is best for your child, and might be best if your child is younger than school age. That way, their normal routines are less interrupted and each parent can spend time with their child during more formative years.

Every 3rd Week Schedule

This schedule is best for parents who want to spend longer periods of time with their child. By using this schedule, your child will live with the primary parent for two weeks and then the secondary parent for the third week.

This schedule would mean that the second parent is going to go two weeks without being with their child. This may not be best for some families. However, if one parent lives farther away and the child is not school-age, this could be a great option.

When considering this schedule for a school-age child, you want to make sure both parents live close enough to the school and to the child’s activities. This will help reduce interruptions in your child’s life.

This is also where communication is key between each co-parent. Since the child will be spending a bigger chunk of time with one parent, it’s important to talk about what happened while the child was with each parent.

If your child is young enough, they might hit some milestones while in the custody of one parent, like crawling or talking. This can be an exciting time for both parents with a lot of communication involved.

If your child is older, personality will also help you decide if this is the right schedule. Your child might enjoy spending a lot of time with each parent, or they might struggle with being away from one parent for too many days or weeks. This could cause anxiety, so discussing it with your child could be a helpful strategy.

Every Third Day Schedule

The last common version of the 70/30 schedule is frequently transitioning the child to each parent every third day. This will only work if your child can handle traveling between parents this often.

With this schedule, the primary parent, or Parent A, will have the child for two days, and then the other parent, or Parent B, will be with them for one day. The child will then go back to Parent A.

This can be especially easy if the parents live close to each other and have similar work schedules. It’s also important for you to have a good relationship with your ex-partner, since this type of schedule involves a lot of communication and transitions.

It can be challenging to pick the right schedule that will work best for your child. While each schedule is a viable option, it’s important to understand which one is best for your particular situation.

70/30 Joint Custody Schedule for Based on Age

Your child’s age is an important factor in deciding the right custody schedule for your family. If your child is an infant, it will be important for them to be with their mother for more of the time, especially if the child is breast-fed.

This also means that any schedule involving a lot of time away from the primary parent might not be best if you have a baby. A schedule like the every third day schedule might be best so that the child isn’t away from the mother for more than one night at a time.

If your child is a toddler, there’s a bit more flexibility in what they might be able to handle. The every weekend schedule is usually popular for toddlers since it’s consistent and allows the child to know what to expect. This type of consistency also helps a toddler to adapt to parent separation.

For older children who are in school, you might want to work with your co-parent to consider a schedule that will fall in line with your child’s school and activities. If one parent lives farther away and your child has sports or other activities on the weekends, the 5-2 alternate weekend schedule could work out.

Also, since your child’s needs will change as they get older, your schedule can also change. Staying in frequent communication with your co-parent will allow you to discuss what’s best for your child during different phases of life. This will also keep you both flexible and willing to adapt to your child’s needs.

What Else Should You Know Before Choosing a Schedule?

Other than age, you may have more things to consider before you settle on a 70/30 schedule, like making sure you’re following your state’s laws. While parents are able to choose which schedule works best, it’s important that they make sure they’re following the child custody laws in their state.

Additionally, other than meeting your child’s needs based on the school schedule, you also want to meet your child’s emotional, physical and developmental needs. For example, if you have a teenager, their social schedule will also be an important factor for consideration.

Previously in this article, I’ve also mentioned that location can affect what schedule works best. If parents live close together, they can have a schedule that involves more frequent exchanges for the child.

If one parent lives in another state, things might get more complicated for your 70/30 schedule. Creating balance and maintaining consistency remain important but become more difficult if your child will be traveling farther. Also, keep in mind that both parents will want to understand each state’s laws to keep making sure you’re following the rules.

What If You Can’t Agree on a 70/30 Schedule?

The best case scenario would put you and your co-parent in the best positions to be raising your child. In this ideal situation, you can communicate easily and your child is able to transition to follow the joint custody schedule with ease.

However, some parents, especially separated parents, have trouble putting their differences aside and finding the right parenting agreement and schedule that works for everyone. If you’re unable to make an agreement, you might need to rely on a standard custody agreement.

This type of agreement will give the non-custodial parent one evening a week. This parent will also have every other weekend with the child. The rest of the time will be spent with the custodial-parent, also known as the primary parent. 

Clearly it would be best for both parents to be involved in making the decision, and finding a more customized agreement. This way, you can also adjust the agreement easier as your child ages.

Get Help Organizing Your 70/30 Custody Schedule

Developing the right 70/30 custody schedule for family can be challenging. It’s important to consider all the important factors when deciding what will work best, but you can also get help to make organizing your schedule easier!

Check out the 2houses co parenting app for more help creating your schedule and staying on top of your custody planning.

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How Dads Can Take Care of Their Mental Health When Co-Parenting

Mental health

Co-parenting isn’t always smooth for everyone. Each co-parenting dynamic is different for each set of parents, meaning some situations are more challenging to navigate than others. Although disagreements over scheduling or subtle tension between yourself and your ex-partner may not seem like a big deal at first, constantly dealing with that underlying stress can take a significant toll on your mental health.

As June is Men’s Health Month, it’s essential to bring awareness to all aspects of men’s health, including mental well-being. Keep reading to learn more about how dads can stay mentally strong when co-parenting. But first, let’s take a look at the connection between men and mental well-being.

Men and Mental Health

Although society is making more ground in the mental health space, there is still a lot of work to be done. Stigmas surrounding mental health, especially for men, are still very prevalent. A lot of it stems from the assumption that “masculine” men shouldn’t ask for help and handle things independently. To ask for help is perceived as “weak.” Due to this stereotype, amongst many others, men are less likely to schedule doctor’s appointments. According to a survey done by Cleveland Clinic, 72 percent of men would rather do household chores, like cleaning the bathroom or mowing the lawn, than go to the doctor.

This is a problem as you cannot always deal with specific physical or mental health issues on your own. Consulting a trusted medical professional to help you develop a plan of action can help you address and sort out whatever is ailing you. Taking care of your mental health is extremely important if you have children seeing as it can affect everything from their development to their own mental health.

How Mental Health Affects The Kids

Mood Issues

It’s a common saying that kids are like sponges, and that isn’t necessarily wrong. Kids, especially young ones, soak up a lot of what their parents say and do, as well as how they feel. If you’re struggling mentally, whether you mean to or not, you may be passing your struggles off unknowingly on to your child. While mental disorders are not contagious, that doesn’t mean your child’s mood may not take a hit. Being around a parent who isn’t functioning at full capacity because of mental health struggles isn’t easy on anyone, let alone the child. Being with someone through the ups and downs of their health can be very taxing and affect their own mental health as long-term stress is usually a catalyst.

Behavioral Problems

A CDC article states that at least 1 in 4 children have a caregiver with mental health difficulties, meaning kids are more exposed to mental health issues than people may realize. If your child is acting out, it may be a result of your poor mental health. The helplessness children feel when they cannot help their parents, who are struggling mentally, can sometimes feel consuming and make them wonder what they’re doing wrong. Constantly feeling like things are out of their control or believing that they are the cause of your mental distress can result in them acting in ways that they normally would not.

How Mental Health Affects You

Your Self-Esteem

Mental health and self-esteem sometimes go hand in hand. When you’re dealing with bipolar disorder, anxiety, or depression, it’s common for negative thoughts to take over. As a dad, you may feel like you aren’t being a good enough parent or feel like you’re not good enough in general. Thoughts and feelings like this only serve to make your mental well-being worse, creating a cycle of negativity. Not only does stress affect the emotional side of things, but it can also affect more minor things that impact your self-esteem, like your hair, skin, and overall body image. For many, their appearance is their primary source of confidence, and when things are off, it can really affect you. Self-esteem and confidence issues can cause eating disorders, unhealthy lifestyle choices, and more.

Higher Risk For Disease

Mental illness is also usually a result of long periods of stress without reprieve during that time. This can put you at a higher risk of developing diseases like high blood pressure, diabetes, and heart disease since excessive stress is linked to a variety of health problems. If these problems are left unchecked, they can severely impact your quality of life causing you not to be able to function on the level that you’d like. Additionally, those who struggle with mental health may have a higher likelihood of turning to unhealthy outlets such as drugs and alcohol. This only serves to make matters worse as vices like alcohol worsen mood and health over time and only provide monetary satisfaction. This also won’t help your co-parenting situation, as excessive alcohol use is not conducive to a healthy home environment for your child.

Affects Co-Parenting

Mental health symptoms in men don’t always look like what is deemed “common” symptoms. For example, men who experience conditions like depression are often aggressive, angry, and/or irritable. While your mental health battles may cause your mood to fluctuate, your ex-partner may not know that. To them, you may seem like you’re in a never-ending bad mood, which can cause tension between the two of you. Tension often leads to a disagreement which isn’t ideal for people in a co-parenting relationship since you want to provide a healthy environment for your child or children. With that being said, while you don’t need to tell your ex-partner what you’re going through specifically, you still need to hold yourself accountable. If you are acting unlike yourself or feeling more irate than normal and it’s affecting your ability to co-parent, it’s your job to take the steps necessary to get the help you need.

Take Some Time

It won’t hurt to take some time for yourself every now and then. Many parents feel guilty when they’re spending time on or with their children, but they shouldn’t. Self-care is an integral part of overall wellness, including mental health. Sometimes your everyday life stressors like co-parenting can feel overwhelming, and you may need a break from it. On one of your off days away from your child, schedule some “me” time. Me time can mean a range of things and can be anything that you want. Men tend to shy away from self-care because of the notion that it’s all facials and bath bombs, however, it is not. While that may be self-care to some, it’s not what it has to look like for you. Your self-care day may look like taking a scenic drive or picking yourself up some of your favorite restaurant food. No matter what it is, take joy in doing something that is stress-free. This will give you much-needed time to rejuvenate before you see your child again.

Solutions To Try

Seeing as sometimes co-parenting may involve custody hearings, making sure your mental health is in optimal condition is essential. You need to show that you are mentally fit enough to take care of your child, so if co-parenting is the source of your mental distress, you should try and rectify the situation sooner rather than later.

Let It Go

A lot of the time, the tension between two parents comes from their previous relationship with each other. Depending on what happened, it can sometimes be hard to move on from situations despite having a child with that person. Every time you see them it can bring forward a bunch of emotions that you may not want to think about. However, sometimes releasing that anger or hurt is the best thing for you. Holding onto those negative feelings can lead to resentment building within the relationship, which doesn’t help you. It can be damaging to your mental well-being and it isn’t good for your child to see, hear or feel constant tension between you and your ex-partner. While it may be easier said than done to start things fresh, you should try to make an effort for your child. Because the most important thing is making sure your child has the best upbringing that they possibly can.

Talk Your Ex-Partner

This can mean a lot of different things depending on your situation. If you currently have a strenuous relationship with your ex-partner, try talking things out with them and coming to a truce. Don’t underestimate the power of a respectful and level-headed conversation. If you think you’re going to struggle to have a decent conversation with your ex-partner, consider getting a third party involved. A mediator can help you to have a productive conversation, and get things on the right track. Alternatively, if you still don’t want to see your ex-partner, you may benefit from tools that help separated parents communicate without being in-person to help mitigate potential problems. Aside from that, talking to your co-parent may also mean divulging when you need help. If you’re having a difficult time and need some time to work things out, let your ex-partner know so you can both come up with a plan that works best for your child.

Gain Confidence

Regain confidence in yourself and your parenting skills. With a lot of aspects of self-esteem, you have to remind yourself that you’re trying your best and that you are enough. Whether this means thinking positively about your parenting abilities or your overall life, make sure you remember the good you’re doing. Also, don’t forget to gain confidence in other aspects of your life too, since it can increase overall happiness. Struggling with your physical appearance can have a toll on your confidence, which can affect your overall well-being, so don’t let your insecurities run the show. Take charge and reinvent yourself. That new suit you wanted? Buy it and walk around confidently. Are you tired of your hair or lack thereof? Go to a salon or use a hair loss treatment to help make you feel like a new person. Whatever it may be, make sure you’re doing things that make you happy and gaining that confidence back to be the best parent you can be.

See A Therapist

Going to see a therapist is highly stigmatized. A lot of times people feel shameful if they seek out professional help as if there’s something wrong with it—there isn’t. Taking care of your mental health should never feel shameful or embarrassing. It will only serve to help improve your relationship with your ex-partner and better the upbringing for your child and that’s the most important thing. If you’ve never been to a therapist before, make sure you do your research. You want to make sure you’re going to someone who is professional and has your best interest at heart. Also, don’t feel as if you have to stay with one of your first, second, or even third therapist. You can switch as many times as you’d like until you find the right one.

Final Thoughts

Never be afraid to tell someone you trust about what you’re going through, no matter how big or small it may seem. Letting things out and letting someone know that you’re struggling is one of the best things you can do for your mental health. Sometimes all you need is a listening ear and someone to say that they understand. If you aren’t comfortable talking to a professional or a loved one, consider reaching out to an online support group to talk to people going

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What Does a 80/20 Custody Schedule Look Like? A Guide for Parents

80/20

Parenting is hard. Co-parenting is even harder.

Co-parenting is a term used for any separated, divorced, or “two house” families trying to raise a child or children together. With around half of all modern marriages ending in divorce, co-parenting is used more than ever. Unfortunately, it isn’t easy to co-parent, and many previous couples struggle with it.

One of the biggest challenges co-parents face is establishing a custody schedule that works for them. In many situations, a judge will have a lot of say in who the primary residence or primary custodial parent is. However it works out, some parenting time plans work out to something known as an 80/20.

But what is an 80/20 custody schedule? What does it look like? Continue reading to learn everything you need to about this specific type of custody schedule.

What’s an 80/20 Custody Schedule?

An 80/20 schedule is when a child (or children) spends 80 percent of their time with one parent and 20 percent of their time with the other. In these situations, one parent usually has primary physical custody. However, this type of custody schedule may also be used when the arrangement is sole physical custody with scheduled visitation.

Determining the percentage parenting time amounts to can be confusing. For this type of agreement, it generally works out so the non-custodial parent has three overnight visits every two weeks. Those visits don’t have to be consecutive, but they can be.

How the 80/20 custody schedule works best will depend on several factors. Primary factors include:

  • The age of the child (or children)
  • How far apart the parents live from one another
  • How involved each parent was in caring for the children before separation
  • If the courts are involved, what type of determination they’ve made

There may be other factors to consider in your unique case. Below you can see a few examples of typical 80/20 parenting schedules to help get a better idea of what this looks like in practice.

80/20 Custody Examples

It’s essential to know all custody agreements can be individualized. Using a mediator through court, along with a co-parenting app, can help the two parents figure out what works best for them.

That being said, there are a few recommended options for setting up an 80/20 schedule, based on the child’s age and how close the parents live. These schedules can be used exactly or as a reference to create a similar plan that works best for your situation.

When Parents Live Near Each Other

When parents live near each other, there’s more flexibility in how custody schedules can be set up. The closer parents live, the more flexibility. For these options to work, parents would ideally live an hour or less away from one another.Toddlers/Until School (Around Age 4 to 5)

Toddlers benefit from frequent contact with the non-custodial parent whenever possible. This is because toddlers (and even preschoolers) are still developing bonds with both parents. Before starting school, it’s recommended toddlers see the non-custodial parent for three non-consecutive overnights every two weeks.

The overnights can be scheduled in a way that best works for both parents. Generally, however, one overnight each weekend usually works well. The third overnight is usually scheduled for a weekday, once every two weeks.

This may not work for every parent, however. Parents who work early mornings Monday through Friday may find weekday overnights difficult. There are ways to work around this.

The non-custodial parent could, for example, pick the child up after work on a weekday. They could then be brought home before bedtime instead of being kept overnight. It isn’t recommended that toddlers stay two consecutive nights away from the custodial parent.Older Children/Teenagers

Once children are older, they can successfully move to every other weekend visitation. Older children and teenagers do well with these schedules because they’ve already built strong bonds with both caretakers. In most circumstances, their bond with the non-custodial parent won’t be affected by more extended periods apart.

With an 80/20 custody schedule, three overnights every other weekend is the general rule. For parents who live close together, Friday evening until Monday may work well.

This would, however, put the non-custodial parent in charge of dropping the child at school on Monday morning. If that isn’t possible due to work conflicts, every other weekend from Friday until Sunday is one option. Using a co-parenting app can help ease confusion about when each parent is available and how much quality time they spend with the child or children.

When Parents Live Further Apart

When parents live further apart, custody schedules can be more challenging to create. This is especially true when children are younger and do best without extended stays away from the custodial parent. However, each child is unique, and what works for one family may not be best for another.Toddlers/Until School (Around Age 4 to 5)

Until children begin school, long-distance parenting plans may do well with one overnight each weekend. While similar to the schedule mentioned earlier, there is one significant difference. The one overnight during a weekday every two weeks is dropped due to distance.

There are ways to make up most (or all) of this missed parenting time without keeping the toddler from the custodial parent for more than one night.

One option is to use a slightly later drop-off time when the child is with their alternate parent. If the regular drop-off time would be 10 am on Sunday, the schedule can be rearranged to have a drop-off at 5 pm on Sunday. This adds 7 hours each week to the non-custodial parent’s time, thus making up most of the missed weekday visit mentioned above.Older Children/Teenagers

The same schedule that works for older children and teenagers above can work with long-distance parenting, with very few modifications. Instead of staying from Friday until Monday of every other weekend, teens should be returned Sunday, so they’re ready for school in the morning.

Another long-distance option for older children and teenagers is two weekends on and one weekend off. In this custody schedule, the children spend two weekends with the non-custodial parent, followed by a weekend with the custodial parent. If either parent wanted a specific weekend during the year, this could be worked into the schedule.

When an 80/20 Might Be the Best Choice for You

There are many custody schedule options. Much of how custody is determined will depend on what the courts say and the schedules of each parent. Sometimes, custody can be worked out between two parents.

That being said, there are specific circumstances where an 80/20 custody schedule may be the best choice for you. These include:

  • When one parent was granted primary physical custody
  • When one parent has sole physical custody and the other parent has scheduled visitation
  • When one parent is unable to spend more time with the children for any reason
  • When parents live further apart
  • One parent has been the primary or sole caregiver of the children during the relationship (or during the children’s lives if parents weren’t together)
  • Both parents agree on an 80/20 custody schedule
  • The child or children do best with a single home base
  • The child or children have special needs that make frequent transitions difficult

This isn’t an all-inclusive list. There may be other reasons for choosing an 80/20 custody schedule over other options. There are also many reasons why an 80/20 custody schedule may not be the best option for you.

An 80/20 split in parenting time may not be suitable for your situation if:

  • The non-custodial parent has more time to spend with the child
  • The courts have appointed joint custody to the parents
  • Both parents were equally involved in the child’s care before separation
  • Both parents agree a different custody schedule would work best
  • Parents live in different states or countries (which requires a very different schedule)

Frequently Asked Questions About the 80/20 Custody Schedule

It’s normal to have questions about the 80/20 custody schedule and custody arrangements in general. Below are answers to a few of the most common questions or concerns parents have.

Does Parenting Time Have To Be Exactly 80/20 in These Arrangements?

No, parenting time doesn’t have to be exactly 80/20. However, it’ll fall roughly around those numbers. Depending on the custody schedule, parenting time may be 82/18, 76/24, or something else that is close to 80/20.

Is an 80/20 Schedule the Only Option for Separated Parents?

No. There are many different custody schedule options for parents, with the 80/20 parenting time split being one. Different custody schedules work for different families.

Some parents have a 50/50 custody schedule where the child spends an equal amount of time with each. Others have a 70/30 parenting agreement that usually works out to one parent having weekdays and the other having weekends. It’s up to the two parents and the courts to determine which custody agreement works best for everyone.

What if I Want More Than 20 Percent Time With My Child?

If you’re the non-custodial parent in an 80/20 schedule and want more time with the child, it depends on whether the courts made the custody determination. If the courts determined that custody should be 80/20, you’d need to return and refile to have it changed. If the custody was set up outside of court, you could open up a conversation with your child’s other parent.

What’s the Easiest Way To Set Up a Custody Schedule?

The easiest way to set up a custody schedule is through a co-parenting app, like 2houses. In some situations, it’s necessary to first go to court or mediation to determine the type of custody split. Then, you and your co-parent can choose how that time is split via the application.

What if Something Comes up To Interrupt the Custody Schedule?

Things can (and will) happen to disrupt your custody schedule. These things may be short-term emergencies or long-term life changes. When this happens, it’s best to communicate openly with your co-parent about the situation.

If there’s strife or other issues between you and the other parent, it’s recommended that all contact be documented. This protects both parties from “he said, she said” situations. It also helps make communicating less stressful for both parties.

Documentation can be done in several ways. Co-parenting apps are one option for documented communication. Other options include text messaging and email.

What if There Is a Restraining Order Involved?

When a restraining order is involved, it stops one parent from contacting the other. Sometimes, however, they’ll still share custody of the child in an 80/20 custody schedule or similar. This adds more difficulties to an already challenging situation.

A co-parenting app can be especially useful in this situation. If the courts allow for a singular, documented form of contact specifically about the children, an app is a perfect option. It will enable all conversations to be recorded while still maintaining necessary lines of communication between parents about the child.

More Questions About What an 80/20 Custody Schedule Looks Like?

An 80/20 custody schedule is where a child spends 80 percent of their time with one parent and 20 percent of their time with the other. This works best in certain situations, such as when parents live far apart, or one parent has been granted primary physical custody of the children.

To make any custody agreement work, open communication is essential. After splitting, many parents find communication difficult or impossible. Others find they’d like a more organized way of discussing or presenting custody schedule options.

That’s why 2houses was created. The co-parenting app takes the hassle out of creating a custody schedule and streamlines communication. Sign up today and see for yourself.

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How a Co-Parenting App Can Help in a Separation with Kids

Coparenting app

Co-parenting can be challenging and filled with emotions. You might be feeling stressed from communicating with your ex-partner. You may also struggle with the organization required when your children are switching between parents.

Two people sharing responsibilities over two houses can be difficult. While some of that stress might be unavoidable, a lot of the details and logistics can be handled with a co-parenting app!

If you’re wondering how a co-parenting app can help you in separation with kids, keep reading this informative article! You’ll find practical uses and benefits that explain how an app can help you manage your custody schedule.

What Is a Co-Parenting App and Why Is It Useful?

A co-parenting app is a smartphone application that is built to help separated families. If you’re a divorced or separated parent, these apps help you to communicate with your co-parent.

Some co-parenting apps are for communication and messaging. But other apps also help you keep logistics organized. This might include details like your schedule, doctor’s appointments, soccer practices and even tracking expenses. 

It’s helpful to be able to talk to your ex about your children in one place. But, it’s even more helpful to also store all these messages and documents in one place.

In general, most co-parenting apps function to keep track of your children’s activities, time schedules, and expenses.

This is useful for sorting out custody time, as well as financial responsibilities. This also helps to make all the important information accessible to all parties.

The 2Houses app allows parents to exchange important information, like school details and medical notes. You can also receive help with storing documents and keeping messages with mediator access.

Frequent Features

One of the most important features of the 2Houses app is the shared calendar, which allows you to build an interactive calendar. You can also sync the calendar with other major apps, like Google calendar and Outlook.

If your child is scheduled for a dentist appointment in the same week as your work trip, it will be important to communicate all the details with your ex. You also want to talk without stressing about how to keep all the details clear.

Another essential feature is the finance tracker. This tracker allows you to log all the shared expenses. This means both you and your co-parent can view any expenses.

You can also build reports that show spending over time, and you can even organize this by category. This might help you to show how much you are contributing to your child’s costs.

Additionally, banking information can be stored on the app. Upload other important information about your children, like social security numbers, medical information, and clothing sizes.

You can be sure that this information will be safe and central. This way, both you and your child’s other parent have equal access to important information. 

This parenting app also contains a journal where you can write information to share. This allows you to share memories about your children as they go through important milestones in life!

The Benefits of a Co-Parenting App to Improve Communication

Now that you know the features of a co-parenting app, it’s important to understand the benefits of these features.

This way, you can begin to see how a co-parenting app can improve your life. The first improvement that you might see from a co-parenting app is communication.

Talking to your ex can be difficult, but it’s a key part of success when it comes to co-parenting. You and your ex need to be able to discuss any upcoming dates and events for both yourselves and your children.

You will also want to keep each other up to date on general life updates that occur while your children are in each other’s custody. This will end up creating a better relationship between yourself, your co-parent, and your children.

But, this can end up being challenging for two people who are no longer involved romantically.

You might also find that one person is more willing to communicate than the other. You might be sending messages about events, and they either got lost in the shuffle of their phone texts or they might say they never received them.

Keeping all your information in one central place helps to ensure that everyone is on the same page when it comes to raising your kids. This also helps you and your ex to communicate more healthily and respectfully since all the messages are stored.

If you also worry about your ex intervening in your relationship with your child, you can make sure everything is clear through the app.

Even in the best co-parenting relationships, it’s easy to lose important information about homework, playdates, and medical appointments, so a co-parenting app will help keep it all in one place.

Using an App to Help with Co-Parenting Organization

Another huge benefit of a co-parenting app is the ability to organize information between your houses. Not only do you need to keep your logistics in order, but you will also have a lot of paperwork to keep track of.

Many doctor’s offices and schools are using digital and email records, which makes it even easier to store your information in the app.

This also makes it challenging to search your inbox. So it’s important to be able to access your children’s records in a central place that both parents can see.

If your children are school-age, you will also need to keep all their school information organized. Imagine being able to store each teacher’s name, along with your children’s grades, permission slips, and school numbers.

You might have much more information about your children than you’d even think, and all of this should be kept in one place. Things like phone numbers for friends, insurance information, and birthday wishlists can all be stored.

Especially if you have more than one child, the paperwork and details involved can be complicated. It can end up as a stack of papers or a bunch of emails that can get lost or easily forgotten about. 

You can also upload other information like vaccination records and identification documents. This ensures that both parents have everything they need and that you can keep it all in one online filing system.

For example, your child might want to go on a school trip to another country. But one parent keeps all the important documents like passports and social security numbers. So you might be stuck having to call them for information.

By keeping these documents stored in one place, both parents feel involved in their children’s lives. 

The Benefits of Using an App for Documentation

As mentioned above, a co-parenting app stores your information for you in an easy-to-access manner. The history of communication through the app is also stored.

This means if you end up in a situation where you are disagreeing with your co-parent about something that is said, you can refer back to the messages, schedule, or document you’re referring to.

This is especially important if you are in a stage of the separation process with lawyers and court hearings. You will need to be able to show certain proof of expenses.

Being able to show both expenses and proof of communication can go a long way in showing your level of responsibility and organization. Since the information is stored for both parties, you will also not end up with one person claiming they never received a message.

So if you message your ex about arranging a pickup time and they don’t show up, you can refer back to the app to show exactly what was initially agreed upon.

Again, even in the smoothest parenting relationships and separation with kids, it’s still important to have documentation. 

For example, you might have agreed to share expenses. But you may believe you have been spending more on school supplies, clothing, and food for the past month.

With a co-parenting app, you can bring up a chart to show where the money has been going for each person.

Using a Co-Parenting App to Keep Everyone in the Loop

Aside from documentation and imaging situations where one parent is at odds with the other, a co-parenting app is also a great way to keep all the important parties in the loop.

Your children are more than schedules and paperwork, and they will be making memories with each parent along the way.

Staying active and present in your child’s life is a top priority for each parent. But it can be difficult to do this when your child is splitting their time with your ex. Technology has allowed us to keep people involved even at a distance. 

By using the app, you can not only arrange for face-to-face exchanges with your children, but you can also use the in-app journal to share experiences.

If only one parent can attend a play or game for your child, you can use the journal to recap the memory and help the other parent feel involved. You can add photos to share even more memories and store these important events.

This app is also helpful for day-to-day thoughts and concerns about your children in a private manner. So you able to share important memories with your ex.

You can also communicate in free space with your thoughts and concerns without having to message them separately from the app. This is a great way to keep track of updates about your children. 

For example, you might be trying to raise a teenager who could be telling one parent a story and change the story completely for parent 2. By communicating through a co-parenting app, you keep your kids accountable.

This will also make sure nothing is falling through the cracks. Everything will also be saved, so the journal is a great way to reflect on your children’s lives throughout the year. 

Still Questioning the Use of a Co-Parenting App?

Sometimes we are all hesitant to add another app or technology service to our lives. Especially when as parents, we’re already involved in far more things than we can keep track of.

So you might still be questioning the use of a co-parenting app in making your life a bit easier.

Whether you’re at the beginning stages of a divorce or you’re trying to improve your relationship with your ex for the sake of your children, a co-parenting app can be the right tool to improve your life. 

This is a great option for you to each is held accountable for your responsibilities. But it helps you to not have to physically jot down notes about schedules that you might lose later on.

Also, if you need a mediator, the 2houses app has a special feature that allows you to share communication with a mediator to keep your relationship and communication more civil and productive.

An App to Help Take the Stress Out of Co-Parenting

The last thing a busy parent need is another service to keep track of, which is why a co-parenting app helps to centralize all your children’s needs in one place. This way, both parents have access to all documents and notes.

Learn more about the features 2houses has to offer. Discover how you can start improving your co-parent communication to make your life and your children’s lives a bit easier.

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Top DIY Gift Ideas for Father’s Day as Separated Parents

Separated parents

If you’re part of a two-household family, you’re probably intimately familiar with the struggles of holidays.

Whose house do we celebrate at? Do holiday plans conflict with the schedules of kids’ extracurriculars or the co-parenting schedule?

As a child of separated parents, you have your own difficulties. You want your parents to feel equally appreciated and loved, but it can be hard sometimes to show how much you care.

As a divorced or separated mother, you want to encourage a healthy relationship between your children and ex-husband. Helping them put together a memorable Father’s Day is a great way to do that.

On average, people spend $139 on a Father’s Day gift, but 45% of dads say that they want something unique. You don’t need to break the bank to give Dad exactly what he wants.

A handmade gift lets your father know that you gave time, thought, and hard work to their present. This Father’s Day, show your dad how much you appreciate him in these trying circumstances with one of these DIY gifts.

For the Home

Whether Dad lives with the kids or by himself, he’ll appreciate anything that makes life around the home a little easier or brighter to look at. These fun gift ideas will make him think of you whenever you can’t be with him.

Wondering how often the kids should be away? Check out this helpful guide.

Air Fresheners

Nothing says home like a fresh scent as soon as you walk in the door. Fill spray bottles with 2 cups of water, about 25 drops of essential oil in Dad’s favorite scent, and 2 tablespoons of baking soda.

A couple of sprays around the room make all the difference, and a spray is much safer than a candle. This gift is personalized and useful, and dad is sure to love its comforting smell.

Heart Thumbprint Magnets

Your dad has probably received numerous drawings from his children, and he wants to display them all. The refrigerator door is a classic spot for drawings, but he’ll need magnets. 

These glass thumbprint magnets are easy to make with supplies from your local craft store – ink pads, a permanent marker, class gems, glue, and ceramic magnets.

Make pictures of Dad’s favorite animals, sports teams logos, or a simple heart as a representation of your love.

Popsicle Stick Photo Frame

No family home is complete (whether a split home or not) without family photos. Make sure to take a couple on your next outing with Dad

Popsicle sticks glued together to make a base with the photo pasted on top make the perfect “made it myself” photo frame. Decorate with colored markers, glitter, stickers, and anything else you can find to complete.

Vinyl Record Bowl

Is your dad a music buff? Maybe there’s a specific song that means a lot to you together. A scratched record of significance can be turned into a beautiful gift bowl with these easy steps.

Find a vinyl record (preferably with some damage already done) at a thrift shop or online. Preheat your oven to 200 degrees. Stack an oven-safe bowl on a cookie sheet and put the record on top of the bowl in the oven. 

Leave it in the oven for about 10 minutes. Take out the vinyl and help press the shape exactly how you want it. Place back in the oven for another 5-10 minutes.

Take the vinyl out again and press the now malleable material into the bowl to create your desired shape. 

Let the vinyl cool, and you should have a very special catch-all bowl or candy dish to give to your dad.

Tie Rack

Put your hammering skills to use by making Dad an easy tie rack. Simply take a board of wood and hammer nails in an orderly fashion in the front. Attached a wall fastener to the back and voila! Easy organization for your hardworking dad.

No-Sew Throw Blanket

Throw blankets are easier to make than many people realize – no sewing skills required!

Simply purchase two sheets of fleece from the fabric store in the size and pattern of your preference. Cut out a five by five square from each corner.

With the sheets laid on top of each other cut a fringe a little wider than your finger. Go along the fringe tying the pieces with a double knot to each other to create a no-sew hem.

Now, dad has a lovingly made blanket to put over his legs as he reads or watches TV at night.

For the Kitchen

Is your dad handy in the kitchen? Or maybe he just loves to eat! These father’s day gifts are sure to make him smile whether he uses them to make his own creations or chows down on yours.

Homemade Orange Bitters

An Old Fashioned is a classic Dad Drink. It’s a mix of strong and sweet (just like him) and easy to make at home if you have the right ingredients.

Check out this recipe for orange bitters – a key component of an Old Fashioned and many other delicious cocktails. It’s made with natural and fresh ingredients for a stronger, better taste.

Barbecue Rubs

Father’s Day means that summer is just around the corner. Help Dad get ahead with his summer barbecue plans by making him a signature meat rub.

Experiment with ingredients like brown sugar, salt, pepper, paprika, cayenne, garlic, onion, and mustard til you get something that smells delicious. Maybe throw in a secret ingredient you know he loves (like chili powder!).

Infused Olive Oil

Another great option if your dad loves to cook is infused olive oils. They can be used as a marinade, on top of pasta or salad, or to dip bread in. 

You can find recipes here for garlic chili, lemon, and rosemary-infused olive oils.

Homemade Cookies

If your dad isn’t so much the kind to cook and more the kind to eat, you can’t go wrong with homemade cookies.

Choose a recipe that you’re comfortable with and ice the tops with “dad” in a heart to get the message across. Fil a box with tissue paper and arrange the cookies nicely inside for a snack you can share on Father’s Day.

Pickles

Does Dad prefer a savory snack? Pickles are easy to make and satisfy that umami craving. 

Slice cucumbers and put them into a jar with vinegar, dill, room temperature water, garlic, salt, and a little sugar. Close up tight and allow to brine.

For Hobbies and Work

Your dad is thinking about you all the time – at home, at work, and at his hobbies. These gifts will help you contribute to those aspects of his life where he may not get to see you.

Bottle Cap Fishing Lures

Did you know that you can make a functional fishing lure for Dad without any expert knowledge? 

With this easy guide, you can! Choose caps from your dad’s favorite beer, or if you’re of legal drinking age gather them up the next time you and he share a cold one. 

Customized Planner

A busy man like your dad could use a helpful planner, and seeing one that’s personalized by you will make him smile every time he uses it.

Buy a plain planner at an office supply store. Decorate the front with paint pens and leave loving notes in corners where he may not expect them. 

Does your dad use his phone more than paper and pen? Encourage him to try this interactive calendar for separated parents.

Eyeglass Case

If your dad wears glasses, a new case makes a thoughtful gift. You can even make it out of an old favorite tie that he recently got a stain on.

Take an old tie and place a pair of glasses on top. Fold up the bottom of the tie so that the fabric covers the glass. Cut off the excess and finish the edge with a whipstitch.

Then, open up the center seam. Sew the two sides of the center seam to the out edges of the folded tie to create a pouch. Finish off with a bit of velcro to the body of the pouch and the point of the tie.

Customized Playing Cards

Is your dad a fan of card games? Give him a gift to show off to all his friends on Poker Night with customized playing cards.

Choose your favorite photo of the two of you together, and use this site to instantly upload and order your own deck of playing cards. 

If cards aren’t his thing, there are lots of other print options available such as photo books, drink tumblers, mousepads, and calendars.

For Preening

Your dad is a handsome guy! He deserves to look and feel his best this Father’s Day. 

PreShave Oil

While many men skip preshave oil, it’s a great way to avoid ingrown hairs and skin irritation. Once your dad receives this homemade version from you, he may never want to go without it again. It’ll leave him with the cleanest shave he’s ever had.

To make it, combine 3 oz of castor oil, 1 oz of olive oil, and 5 drops of Vitamin E oil in a glass bottle. Swirl to mix.

Include some handwritten instructions for a personal touch. Your dad should apply just a few drops on his hands and then rub them onto his facial hair. Let it sit for a minute to soften the hair before shaving as normal.

Shaving Cream

Speaking of shaving, you could make your dad a whole shaving kit for Father’s Day. Include the preshave oil, a nice hand towel, and some homemade shaving cream from this recipe. 

This is another recipe that you can personalize to his favorite scents to be sure that it’s something he’ll love.

Your dad will feel dapper and loved as he prepares his face for his next work meeting, interview, or date.

Hand Lotion

Your memory and your dad are probably full of times you’ve hugged, held hands, or wiped tears away.

Keep your dad’s hands soft and smelling good with a homemade lotion. If he works with his hands a lot, you can feel good knowing that you’ve given him something to take care of himself.

Cards

You should never underestimate a handwritten card or letter. On its own or alongside another DIY gift, a letter is something that you dad will treasure for his whole life.

Write about your favorite memories with him, your hopes for the future, and an inside joke. A Gallup poll found that 97% of Americans love to receive handwritten mail. So, this is something that your dad will surely love and cherish.

Start the tradition now, and your father will be able to collect letters from you year after year. They could eventually be a beautiful family heirloom to share with your own children. 

Separated Parents Can Still Have Great Holidays

Divorce and separation is difficult on both kids and parents, but that doesn’t mean you have to give up on the fun times in life. Father’s Day should still be a celebration of the love between father and child.

Making DIY gifts for Dad shows him that you care and can even be a fun activity to do with Mom. Dad will be sure to appreciate the time and effort put into his gift.

Do you have other worries about navigating co-parenting life? Separated parents have a hard job, but 2houses can make it easier with their planning, scheduling, and communication app.

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Custody Schedule and Father’s Day

Custody and father's day

Custody schedules work well until they don’t. No schedule is foolproof. Even Father’s Day sees alterations.

Most changes are due to everyone’s desire to help with your kid’s events or planned activities.

Have you ever wished you had an app that could handle the process?

An app with functions that allow you to send your ex-spouse and kids a schedule change request. And, having it automated from your calendar.

The good news is that the 2houses app automates change requests so you can get quick answers.

This feature is sure to simplify your communication with your ex-spouse. It will also keep the kids happy knowing that mom and dad are working together on their behalf.

Keep reading to learn more about how to keep your Father’s Day intact regardless of any schedule changes.

Sharing Father’s Day With Your Kids

No matter what your current schedule looks like, it might change if you want to share Father’s Day with your kids. It is important that both parents get equal time with the kids over the holiday. After all, Father’s Day in some families is also about the kid’s granddads.

If you’re fighting for more time, you need to do so in a way that makes the kids feel like they’re part of the solution. You don’t want to be the bad guy when it comes to considerations for Father’s Day. Take time to make sure you understand how your kids want to celebrate.

Kids need their mom and dad to have a good time. You may have family or friends visit your home on Father’s Day, and they may not know this need. You don’t want anyone taking sides against either parent during a holiday.

Instead, you want everyone to hold a positive viewpoint for the sake of the kids. You even hope they are proactive in facilitating the kids connecting with their dad.

Connecting With Dad

It is important for kids to connect with their dad during Father’s Day. This might be a few hours for dinner or the entire weekend. The key is making sure the kids get to share their input.

It is important for the kids to take part when deciding on dates and times for visiting with dad.

If the ex-spouse makes other plans to visit their dad, consider working out time for a phone call. Kids can also spend valuable time with dad through Facetime, Skype, and other media tools. Regardless of the venue or format of communication, the kids must be able to visit in a heartfelt manner.

Free to Be Them

The kids might need enough privacy so they can get goofy without anyone making comments. They need to experience the freedom to be themselves in a different manner with mom and dad.

Or, your kid might want to sing a special song and needs to be in an environment that is judgment-free. Scheduling time for your kid’s parental relationships is important to building their self-confidence.

When we allow our kids to express themselves in a personal manner to either parent, they need to feel secure. To help ease that sense of freedom, consider putting the focus on the kids.

Focus on the Kids

When your ex-spouse is reluctant and only allows for a short visit, keep it simple. Focus on your kids and make sure they understand how important they are in your life. Do not put your kids in the middle of the scheduling conflict.

The worst-case scenario is establishing a special time with the kids later in the week. You can turn the late Father’s Day event into a time of affirmation. After all, there wouldn’t be a reason to celebrate if the kids weren’t a part of dad’s life.

The kids will feel loved knowing both parents support their need to spend time with dad. That demonstration of parental unity will empower the kids. They will learn that it is okay for them to love both dad and mom equally.

This holds true even when the custody schedule isn’t equal.

Custody Schedule

Custody schedules are great if you use them efficiently with a plan. The problem arises when the scheduling system doesn’t fit your lifestyle. The biggest culprit challenging your plan is the wonderful, yet unexpected opportunity.

All schedules include activities that don’t always follow an exact schedule.

To add to the confusion, few are able to change custody-based temporary schedules. Making changes is difficult until the parents settle the permanent parenting plan. Another consideration is the changes that happen at various ages.

Your Kids Needs Will Change

The kids tend to lose out during this period. This can put undue stress on them. Both mom and dad must find a way to address the kid’s needs in a non-confrontational manner.

Regardless of the judge’s final approval of the parenting plan, schedules will still change. Your kids’ lives will continue to evolve, as will their schedules. Consider reading more about these issues in similar posts.

To reduce the conflict, you’ll need a tool that speeds up and simplifies schedule alterations. The 2houses app streamlines all communication regarding the custody schedule.

Tweaking the Schedule

Start by putting your agreed-upon custody schedule in the app. When an opportunity that drives change comes up, send a message within the app. Inform your ex-spouse when you need your kids for a specific reason.

If your ex-spouse is onboard with the tool, the response is quick and easy. The app will notify you once the response to your request is complete. There’s no need to be afraid of an automated system. This co-parenting app does not intrude on your parenting techniques.

The app helps ease parenting problems, especially when you don’t know how to talk about them.

It’s a wonderful app and allows for non-confrontational communications. It even works to support those last-second issues when important opportunities pop up. To make sure nothing is missed due to the changes, the app can send everyone in the family reminders.

What About Schedule Changes?

Submit a request for the time change to the parent in charge of the child at the time. In a situation where you don’t know who this is, you can request an alert and a link to the schedule change. In the event the schedule needs to change, it will notify you by email.

There are options for how the schedule is changed, too. This includes a timer that can be set to run for a certain length of time. You can adjust the schedule on a weekly, monthly or annual basis. You also have the option of a full-page download of the calendar and a summary of your kid’s schedule.

The 2houses app can help a separated parent stay connected. The dashboard offers an easy-to-use method to customize the interface. Life gets easier once everyone uses the app for schedules and related communications.

A Technical View

Let’s say you want to send your ex-spouse relevant information. You’d first go to Settings>Timeline and make a note. Then you’d go to Calendar>Timeline and add in the dates, events, and activities. Finally, select Edit and drag the calendar date to where you want it on the schedule.

You can then select Done and your changes are complete.

How Apps Simplify Your Life

Explaining changes to your ex-spouse becomes a chore when your schedule gets busy. All too often one parent might choose to leverage that precarious moment to inflict hurt. A tool like the 2houses app takes the emotional element out of the mix.

Change requests become a familiar and more accommodating process. The app inspires parents to focus on the kids when managing the schedule. It may even change the atmosphere to one of cooperation.

This keeps the kids out of conflict and can reduce emotional triggers.

The Process

Change requests are saved to the appropriate account. This means you won’t have to always ask your ex-spouse to approve a change. When your ex-spouse is cooperative, change requests fast and free of incident.

You can also set up an alert to notify you as soon as your ex-spouse responds. The 2houses app drives civility, which may have been lost during a heated divorce. It also allows you both to regain some level of respect for each other. The type of respect you give to a co-parent addressing changes with the kid’s best interest at heart.

You’ll want to review any changes that alter the parenting agreement. You’ll have to decide what changes are appropriate or may impact long-term decisions. Once you are content with the change requests, you can submit them to the calendar.

Get Your Kids Input

If you wonder about tips for managing a calendar, the app works best when the kids have access. When they feel like the calendar is theirs, they will take responsibility for its content. This shared calendar will also make a great tool for the family to stay cordial with each other.

With full access, the kids can input their school, clubs, and sporting activities. The calendar is ideal for when your kid decides to try out for a sport or musical theatre. They’ll be able to enter the entire schedule for both mom and dad to review.

Within a few minutes, a healthy resolved calendar emerges.

The 2houses app takes the burden off of your shoulders. It saves you time, energy, and peace of mind. It also protects your kids by showing you what they need.

This gained knowledge will help you stay on top of your parenting decisions.

The Best of Solutions

You can start using the 2houses app before your parenting plan is in place. This will help everyone to better understand the civility of the process. They will also see how things are actually playing out.

The app tends to reduce the emotional angst arising from negotiations. This results in everyone seeing what works for the kids and what doesn’t. That gained knowledge tends to make all parents fairer about schedules.

The 2houses app can be a document that tracks official change requests as required. This digital solution will also help you find any change-related problems. Once caught, you can tweak the schedule to help the kids.

In essence, the app becomes a neutral territory for negotiating schedule changes.

Quality Time With Your Kids

Scheduling is all about making quality time with your kids. Changing plans and rescheduling the activities can make for a long weekend. You’ll be able to spot patterns with the 2houses app.

The patterns will help you give your kids the benefit of the doubt with their scheduling needs.

Busyness is no longer a negative thing when you can make everyone’s schedule more cohesive. Your kids will see your interest in them as you alter things to make sure time together is well spent. They’ll also appreciate their ability to populate the calendar with their desires.

Scheduling video calls with your kids is now easier than ever. The 2houses app has the ability to schedule phone calls and Skype sessions. The app can notify you when it’s time to launch your planned call.

Making Father’s Day Work

The 2houses app will help you share a preliminary custody schedule before mediation. The format allows for rapid changes so you and your ex-spouse can settle faster than expected. As a practical matter, your kids shouldn’t be in a constant state of flux when it comes to their schedules.

Having your custody schedule set ahead of time will keep both you and your ex-spouse happy. You’ll both stay happy when the app facilitates surprise opportunities for you around the holidays. Register for the 2houses app and keep scheduling strains away from the family with this co-parenting app.Ask about order

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The 2-2-3 Parenting Plan and Other Schedules for Summer Vacations

2 2 3 parenting plan

Shared custody is now the most common post-divorce parenting arrangement, which means divorced parents also share responsibility for planning their kids’ summer breaks.

The school year flies by, so before you know it, your children will be home for the summer—and your normal routine goes out the window. A special summer timesharing plan must go into effect.

Will you and your co-parent choose to 2-2-3, week-on/week-off, or something different? When developing a summer parenting plan, hiccups may arise over vacation, family reunions, and the like. 

You can lessen the risk of these disagreements by working out a plan for summer timesharing in advance. Keep reading to learn how to create a summer parenting plan that works for all parties involved.

How to Create a Summer Custody Schedule

All families are familiar with how the hustle and bustle of summer break changes their daily schedules. However, when co-parenting, these changes become more drastic and concrete. 

If you want to develop a timesharing plan that gives your children a relaxing break while creating the least amount of family stress, you must start with the custody schedule laid out in your court order. Use this as a guide to filling out a monthly calendar according to when the children are with you instead of the other parent. 

Your divorce settlement may also layout who the children will spend various holidays with throughout the year. More often than not, the holidays rotate or alternate. The plans are set up this way so that if dad gets Memorial Day, the mom gets the Fourth of July, and so on. You must also account for Father’s Day and any birthdays that occur during the break. 

You’ll also need to take note of how much summer parenting time is allocated to each parent. For example, if you are a non-custodial parent that lives far away, you may have extended parenting time in the summer. 

Take these dates into account because these are the ones you’ll need to plan around. If your co-parent is entitled to eight of ten weeks of summer break, but with flexible dates, this gives you the room you need to plan a family vacation.

Plan Early

A lot of thought goes into setting a summer co-parenting schedule, so it’s best to start planning early. Remember, you’re planning around more than just your own schedule.

If you are proactive about setting the schedule earlier, you can take the potential stress out of determining schedules. Do this right, and you’re more likely to increase the bonds your children have with you and their other parent.

Plus, planning vacations earlier is just smarter—you can take advanced of reduced prices for plan trips, accommodations, and the like.

Look at Your Personal Schedule

First, take a look at what your personal calendar has on it for the summer. Are there any work or social plans that could affect summer timesharing?

Make sure to jot down any important dates now. These might include a family reunion you want to take the kids to or a conference for work out of town. Finalizing your personal schedule will allow you to work out potential future swaps if needed.

Also, check out your childrens’ activity schedules. Look for birthday parties, sports games, or other events you know they wish to attend. 

Will you want to attend any of these as well? 

There may be some events you’ll attend alone, but others you will together. Discuss this with your co-parent and work out an arrangement that allows you both to be as involved as possible.

Communicate Your Timesharing Wish List With Your Ex

Once you’ve considered your personal schedule as well as your children’s, you can arrange to speak with your co-parent about your ideal summer parenting plan. 

It’s important not to spring this on your kids’ other parent. Give them advanced notice, so they have a chance to come up with a list of their own needs and preferences. 

You both must know the difference between preferences and absolutes, especially when a day would fall outside of one parent’s scheduled days.

Negotiate for High-Priority Family Events

When allocating summer parenting time, both of you need to agree to modifications and exceptions for the benefit of the children. 

If it’s your year to have the kids on Memorial Day, but your co-parent’s family is hosting a reunion that day, your kids may benefit from exchanging that holiday for another that fits into your plan. 

When discussing these types of scheduled changes, strive to keep the amount of parenting time the same for each parent. If you ask for three extra days for a beach vacation, find three days you can give back somewhere else to offset the change.

No Premature Plans

It’s fun to plan vacations, especially when kids are involved. As you ask your children what they’d like to do for the summer, don’t make premature promises. 

Your kids will undoubtedly be excited about some of the potential plans. However, your job as a co-parent is to make sure they know that the plans are tentative until the other parent agrees. Nothing is certain until this happens. 

And if your kids are excited about a plan that your ex-partner shoots down, don’t blame your ex or make it seem like they have the last word. This can be considered alienation or lead to resentment.

Possible Summer Parenting Plans

Now that you know what to consider when determining summer timesharing plans, how do you put one into practice? Here are some examples of summer schedules when co-parenting children.

Regular Schedule With a Vacation Option

One of the most common ways of approaching summer break is keeping the regular schedule through the summer months. In this arrangement, the children remain with the custodial parent. Usually, the parents will each have an opportunity to have extended, uninterrupted time (usually two or three weeks). 

This schedule is popular as it’s not as disruptive to the kids’ routine. It might also be preferable to stick with the schedule to align with the parent’s work schedules. If both parents frequently see the children throughout the school year, there may not be a need for a separate summer arrangement.

A common issue with this schedule is that it can be difficult to manage when parents have to work, and kids aren’t at school all day. 

Planning summer camps, daycare, and vacations can then be complicated and lead to disagreements between parents.

Week-On Week-Off

Another arrangement to consider is a week-on-week-off schedule where children alternate weeks with their parents throughout the summer. This is a good schedule if you and your co-parent live near each other and both have good relationships with your children. 

The benefits of this schedule include equal time for parents, which is healthy for most children. It’s also an easy schedule for all to follow, and there is less back and forth. There is less risk for scheduling conflicts and plenty of opportunities for each parent to plan a vacation.

However, sometimes this is a difficult schedule for working parents. Making camp or daycare arrangements every other week can be complicated, overwhelming, and expensive. If you’re concerned about this, consider a 2-week on and 2-week off agreement instead.

Majority to the Non-Custodial Parent

If you and your ex live in different locations, consider an arrangement where the non-custodial parent exercises most of their timesharing during summer break. Since they’re away from the children most of the school year, visitation is limited. Giving them most of the summer is often an amicable way to approach timesharing over summer break.

Giving one parent a large portion of the summer break allows for the additional time needed to strengthen bonds with their children. It also helps children adapt to new environments and a faraway home from the other parent. They can take the time they need to settle in without the burden of school-related activities and stress.

However, the custodial parent often has difficulty with this arrangement as they’re away from their children for long periods. And for the non-custodial parent, it can seem difficult to maintain a relationship after only sporadically seeing their child during the other times of the year.

2-2-3 Schedule

The 2-2-3 schedule is best for parents who want to exercise long weekends during summer break. In this arrangement, or you have the children for two days, the other has them for the next two days, and then the kids go back to the first parent for a long, three-day weekend.

This works because each parent enjoys two days with the children during the workweek and has a long weekend with the children every other weekend.

Many co-parents enjoy this two-week rotating schedule because they get to have equal time with the children. Yes, there is more switching back and forth, but if the parents live close to each other and the children don’t mind the changes, this may be an attractive arrangement for your family.

3-4-4-3 Schedule

The 3-4-4-3 schedule is another 50/50 schedule that includes your children staying with one of you for three days a week and then the other four days. It alternates each week so that you may have the child for four days and your co-parent has them for three.

Parents enjoy the same nights with their children each week—except for the one that occurs on the exchange day. 

This is a great schedule because there are minimal exchanges, and children get to spend an ample amount of time with both parents each week. It’s also favored because each parent has equal time with the children and can assist in daily caretaking.

The children benefit from this arrangement because they don’t go long between exchanges. This schedule can work very well for your family if you and your co-parent have different work schedules.

It depends on which day of the week this schedule starts, but in some cases, one parent may have the children every weekend. When a schedule includes a midweek change, you must communicate well about daycare and summer activities. 

Additional Tips for Smooth Planning

Don’t go into a conversation with your co-parent about an alternate summer schedule blind. Here are some additional tips to ensure the conversation goes smoothly.

Be Flexible

While you might have your own hopes and plans for your children’s summer break, it doesn’t mean your co-parent doesn’t. If they want to plan a vacation with the kids, show them the same courtesy you expect from them. Be flexible!

Yes, compromise means you may not get the exact time you wanted or as much as you usually receive, but always consider accepting this in exchange for your wish list.

Of course, the structure helps determine who will have the kids when, but be flexible with that structure to accommodate activity or travel plans that your co-parent or the children may have.

The more advanced planning you engage in and the more willing you are to be flexible and work with your co-parent, the better your summer schedule will be.

Keep Communication Open 

When planning changes to your custody schedule, it’s essential to keep all lines of communication open—this applies to everyone involved.

Just because you’re on vacation with your children doesn’t mean they should be unable to speak to your co-parent. You may not purposefully interfere or prevent the child’s communications, but be aware that it can seem this way. Just make sure you’re encouraging involvement on both sides.

A common example of this is a parent taking their children out of the country for vacation and not bothering to purchase a cell phone plan that allows for international calling.

Your co-parent could take this scenario to court and use it as an example of you interfering with them speaking to your children, which is a type of parental alienation. The other parent can use this against you when modifying a parenting plan in the future.

It’s Possible to Plan a Schedule That Satisfies Everyone

Summer vacations are special—even magical—to children. You’ve committed to co-parenting your child with your ex, and that involves working together to create schedules that satisfy everyone in the family.

Whether you decide on the 2-2-3, week-on-week-off, or another arrangement, do it together so that you can ensure smooth planning and a summer that’s enjoyable for all. If you’re new to co-parenting and just navigating this for the first time, this co-parenting guide may help.

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6 Tips To Reduce The Stress Of Co-parenting

Tips for co-parenting

Parenting already is a difficult task, but co-parenting, especially with an ex-partner, may prove to be even more complicated. Adapting to the reality of being a co-parent isn’t always easy and swift. It might take a while to come to terms with it, and you’d occasionally have to make sacrifices.

However, always bear in mind that it’s for the betterment of your child/children. You might have to make some compromises you don’t like.  Being a co-parent comes with a heap load of stress. Luckily, this article will explain six ways on how to deal with stress.

1.  Find a support system to vent your feelings.

The stress and mixed emotions that come with co-parenting can be very draining and infuriating. You will occasionally get mad at the co-parent for not doing things your way or in a way you like.

However, It’s important to understand you can’t be in control of everything. Keeping emotions pent up might lead to harboring ill feelings towards your co-parenting partner.

Thus, a support system to vent your emotions will provide you the soft cushion you need to release all the negativity. That support system could be a trusted friend, a therapist, or even a support group. It will make you feel less alone, and your support system can also serve as a voice of reason or advisor during misunderstandings.

You could also release accumulated stress by treating yourself to some white zinfandel wine. This wine is fantastic, and it contains many ingredients that help the body relax.

2.  Effective communication is vital.

As a co-parent, you always have to be accessible to your co-parenting partner at all times. Communication is the most essential and fundamental part of good parenting. Treat your co-parent as a business partner and be civil with them.

Communicate effectively through a designated medium which you’d both agree on. Talk about everything involving your child, so you and your co-parenting partner can make the best decisions. Never forget they’re your partner in this, so don’t make decisions solely.

3.  Create a schedule or calendar to go by.

Organizing and creating a parenting schedule goes a long way in ensuring both parents get to spend equal time with the child. This helps prevent a dispute over visitations and vacations. Plan, even for the unexpected. The schedules will make your life ten times easier as few circumstances would catch you unprepared.

4.  Don’t view your co-parent as an enemy.

Any bad history or issues you might have with the co-parent should be left behind in the past so as to not affect your child. Don’t do anything spiteful to your ex-partner based on your sentiments alone.

Your children’s state of mind and wellbeing as a whole always come first. So, it would be best to avoid doing things because you want to prove a point to the other parent. Make decisions based on what’s best for your child/children.

Strive to have a healthy relationship with the co-parent. Misunderstandings are bound to happen when two individuals have to decide on the same thing but make sure it’s a peaceful and mature conversation that ensues. Having disputes or quarrels in front of your child/children should be avoided at all costs because there’s a high tendency it will reflect on their behavior.

5.  Leave the kids out of grownup matters.

Keep the kids out of your issues, fights, and decision-making with your co-parent. It doesn’t matter if you’re upset at the co-parent, don’t get the child/children involved. They might be acting unreasonable, but never badmouth or demean them to your child or children. Consider their feelings towards this parent and don’t make a big deal out of minor situations.

6.  Learn to be flexible.

There will be instances where your co-parent might want to switch scheduled parenting days with you due to some unforeseen events. Hence, you should try as much as possible to be flexible. It is essential to understand that not all you plan would follow the order you plan it, and that’s okay.

Above all else, you should put your child’s convenience above yours. Amidst all this planning, it is easy to neglect your child’s feelings altogether.

It would be best if you always had a contingency plan for times when you’re busy. Some of these include dropping your child off at a trusted relative or friend’s place.

Final Thoughts

Co-parenting can sometimes feel like an extra job, but it’s worth the work at the end of the day. Even though you might be busy with your child/children, care for yourself too. Take a time out once in a while to do something for yourself. Go out with friends, get a massage, go dancing – whatever it might be as long as it relieves your stress.

If you don’t relieve your stress and you allow it to accumulate, you would do more harm than good to both you and your child.

Research Article

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Coparenting
https://www.huffpost.com/entry/how-to-co-parent-coronavirus-pandemic_l_5e7d1cc7c5b6256a7a27685a
https://www.huffpost.com/entry/issues-all-co-parents-face-and-how-to-overcome-them_n_57856348e4b08608d3321fd0