Category: Health

Going through a divorce feels like the ultimate failure for many people. The mere idea that their Till death do us part turned into Till the road gets rocky can become beyond devastating. However, even when your pain becomes unbearable, you must find the strength to move on and think about your health. Physical, mental and emotional health tend to be affected the most, which is why we have prepared several tips to help you go through this hardship with more ease.

Work out regularly

Keeping your spirit up is vital for your mental and overall health. Blowing off steam by looking for an anger outlet will be highly beneficial for you. Once the grieving period ends, it’s highly likely you’ll feel angry. That’s why you should think about fitness activities that can help you break a sweat and not think about your current situation. Running, boxing and dancing are just some of the exercises that will boost your blood flow and adrenaline while allowing you to clear your head.

Find time to be alone

In time of need, friends and family will want to be around you to lessen the blow of divorce as much as possible. However, while that support always means a lot, you’ll need time for yourself. Those moments when you’re alone with a glass of wine and your favourite music on the radio will offer peace and indulging. A spa ritual with your favourite skincare products, a scented candle and a soaking bath will help you find balance and replenish your spirit. Whether it’s time to knit, paint, or work on some other hobby, as long as you have some time for yourself during the week, you’ll feel much better soon.

Maintain a balanced diet

A loss of appetite is common for people going through a divorce. Not eating enough or skipping healthy food will eventually weaken your immune system. The last thing you need is to get sick so having a balanced diet is vital for you. Having raw cashews on a side of breakfast will keep you energised throughout the day. Feel free to have them as a snack around midday when you feel peckish but not enough to have a full meal. Fill your diet with fruits and veggies, lean meat and dairy. You’ll need all the protein, calcium and minerals to keep a clear head and balanced weight.

Stay in touch with friends

Many people tend to isolate themselves from their friends when they are going through a painful period in their lives. You shouldn’t be one of those people. Your friends will always be there to listen and comfort you. Hearing their opinion will give you many more options to think about and pull you out of your misery. Furthermore, spending time with friends will take your mind off the divorce and make you joyful again. So, why not throw dinner at your home and have a nice little gathering? Go to the cinema, walk, shop and live your life as you usually would.

Don’t neglect your mental health

Have you ever talked to a therapist about your problems? Do you know anyone who’s been struggling with their thoughts and decided to ask for professional help? Even if you don’t, that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t seek out help. Sometimes friends and family can’t offer us the needed comfort and guidance to help us go through a divorce with a positive mindset. That’s the time when you should talk to a therapist and relieve your pain through a conversation.

Regulate your sleeping patterns

Regular sleeping helps our bodies rest and recharge for the following day. That’s why you’ll need to make sure that your sleeping patterns are not disturbed. Once you notice that you’re having difficulty falling asleep, or staying asleep throughout the night, consider changing your bedtime routine. Aside from that, enrich your diet with foods that contain high levels of magnesium, such as soy milk, beans, cereal, nuts, and spinach. Feel free to take melatonin supplements to keep your Circadian rhythm in check.

Go outside and breathe

Sometimes, all you need to do to feel at peace with yourself is go outside and breathe. Connect with nature again to feel destressed. Whether you decide to have a picnic in the park, walk by the beach, cycle next to the river or hike up the mountains, feeling close to nature and enjoying the fresh air will bring the necessary clarity and help you forget about your hardship. It will bring you a newfound respect for life and ever-needed calmness.

Divorcing your spouse will never be easy. No matter how difficult the last couple of months have been for you, you’ll always remember the beautiful times you’ve shared together and how much you used to love each other. That’s why divorce will always feel like a defeat. Nevertheless, you must find the strength to move forward and do everything in your power to stay strong and healthy. Tomorrow is a new day filled with opportunities and a potential love interest that will forever change you and make your life better than ever before.

It’s a familiar pain to many of us. In fact, over 746,000 couples get divorced every year, many of whom have children who will likely remember the process forever.

Fortunately, that doesn’t have to be a negative memory, and there’s a lot you can do to make sure of that. Let’s talk about how to achieve the best results of divorce with children.

Effects of Divorce With Children

It is no secret that divorce is associated with a negative impact on children. Well, the point of this article is to explain that it doesn’t have to have a negative impact.

However, children who experience a divorce often acquire unintended psychological or physiological side effects such as:

• Depression
• Anxiety
• Trust issues
• Aggression
• Social issues
• Insecurity
• Feelings of guilt
• Emotional sensitivity
• Health problems

The list goes on, and can even include developmental delays. There are also many common effects on children’s daily lives, including poor academic performance and impulsive behavior. These symptoms are unique to the child, the child’s age, and the circumstances surrounding the divorce. 

Fortunately, parents have some control over these circumstances. The more hostility, anger, or negative emotions involved in the process, the worse the effects will be. Limiting these 

What Causes A Destructive Divorce?

While there are thousands of possible answers to this question, there are some common themes in divorces that cause unnecessary tension. Here are a few examples.

Financial Disparity

If a child goes to one parent’s house and finds it far more comfortable and feels crowded in the other, this will ultimately lead to problems such as resentment. Because of this, child support is necessary for maintaining a more consistent living standard for the child.

Although, co-parenting is far more expensive when parents are paying for two houses and the resources that come with them. It’s unlikely that both parents earn the same income, and we didn’t even mention the average cost of divorce. We strongly encourage parents to come to terms beyond a simple court decision to ensure the best life for the child.

Distance

If parents live two streets away, it becomes easy for children to quickly travel between and communicate with each parent. However, if one parent lives in North Carolina and the other in Massachusetts, this does nothing but harm the child’s development.

In certain cases, a child is forced to adapt between living situations every week, every other week, or every month with limited contact with the other parent in the meantime. All this does is remove the child’s sense of grounding and create a host of logistical issues.

Not Taking the Child Into Consideration

Particularly, making the divorce about yourselves as parents is one of the worst ways to handle a divorce.

Most parents would be horrified to imagine that their actions are harming their child in some way. However, it takes a special type of parent to consider their child’s needs and emotions during a high-stress period such as divorce. It is a lot easier to be wrapped up in your issues.

Nevertheless, when parents neglect the needs of their children during such a period, the child will suffer unnecessarily. Parents going through a divorce should both agree to prioritize the needs of the child and work as a team to help them. This is true no matter how parents feel toward one another.

Consequently, parents need to collectively think about their actions, words, and moods when around their children.

How To Be an Effective Parent During a Divorce

Effective parenting requires teamwork and a genuine desire to help your child. If you feel that you or the other parent can’t handle this, then a conversation must take place to establish guidelines and boundaries. When both parents read the same co-parenting guide and work to meet their child’s needs, it works out best for everyone.

Be Honest

Honesty is important in any relationship, especially in a situation like divorce. You can spare your child the details of any complications involving the divorce or anything else, but try your best to maintain and earn your child’s trust.

When you initially choose to talk to your child about the divorce, be mindful of your tone, teamwork, and timing.

For example, have you talked to the other parent about having this conversation? Will they be included? Is your child already dealing with problems at school? How will I break the news to them? These are important questions to ask before having the talk.

Also, don’t toy with their emotions. If the decision to get divorced is final, then it’s not okay to get a child’s hopes up by implying that this is temporary or that things may change in the future. If you don’t believe it, don’t let your child believe it.

Finally, be honest with their other parent. Lying to, or withholding information from, anybody in this situation will only harm trust and make the situation more tense than it needs to be.

Be Present

Your child needs to know that they still have their parents, now more than ever. It is important that you are there to answer any questions, lend an ear, or assist with your child’s needs as they come.

Remember, the process of the divorce isn’t the only time when co-parenting is necessary. The need for co-parenting continues on into adulthood after the divorce is finalized.

Because of this, it’s important to think of parenting as a marathon, not a sprint. Figuring out short-term logistics and solutions is part of your job as a parent, but it doesn’t stop there.

Maintain a presence with your child and their other parent, especially in the early stages of the divorce. Make it known that you are available and that you intend to be for the long haul. They need that reassurance.

Communicate Effectively

You don’t have to try to reconcile or improve your intimate relations with one another, but when there is a child involved, you will still need to learn how to communicate. If all communication is done through third parties like lawyers or friends, then you won’t get anywhere. Also, that “third party” should never be your child.

Instead, parents should arrange an agreement to meet and discuss matters related to their child without hostility regularly. Parenting is an ongoing process, and both parties need to remain updated and consistent to be the most effective.

Particularly, you should have routine discussions and remain in contact through texts or calls related to your child’s wellbeing.

Consequently, effective communication should also involve the child. When big changes are approaching, talk to your child ahead of time and let them know the details. Try your best to ensure them that everything will be okay.

Have Good Intentions

We could offer an entire article about the importance of good intentions in divorce. As a parent, you play a major role in setting the tone of the future dynamics. If what you do is with always good intentions, you will usually receive the same respect.

Good intentions should be used across the board. Here’s how.With Your Child

When you communicate with your child or their other parent, good intentions go a long way. The worst thing a parent can do to a child who is already struggling during a divorce is to try to put them in the middle, further change their worldview, or manipulate them.

For example, children should never be led to believe there is a “good guy” or a “bad guy” in a divorce. If you don’t have anything positive to say, it’s better to not say anything at all. Try to use a positive tone when talking to, or about, their other parent.

Moreover, always have the purest of intentions when interacting with your child. It is perfectly okay to feel stressed or angry during a difficult period of your life, but you do not need to put that onto your child. If you are about to say something negative, stop and ask yourself why you are saying it.

Also, if the other parent is seeing someone new, bad-mouthing them is never appropriate. You can’t control how much time that child will spend with that person in the future, so setting the tone for a negative experience serves nobody.With Your Ex

Conversely, if you discover that your separated partner has been mistreating your child in such a way, it won’t help to yell at them or lecture them about it. This will only increase the hostility of the divorce, which your child will sense.

Instead, ask them to sit down and talk about your child’s needs and bring up your concern in a productive, benevolent way. If you say “you’re a manipulative person”, you will only create a hostile environment.

However, if you say “Our child told me that you said this, and I wanted to bring it up with you. I understand tensions are high, but I don’t believe this is helpful to our child’s wellbeing.” Even if this is received poorly at first, this should be a productive way to raise concerns, which is an important part of communication and effective parenting.In Court

The same applies during the actual divorce. If there is something you really want out of the divorce, ask yourself if it is because you truly believe it is fair. If it’s something you believe is right and just, then it’s okay to fight for it.

However, if you are doing something purely out of spite or with the wrong intentions, they will be perceived that way. It’s one thing to claim that you’re doing things in the best interest of everybody involved, but it’s an entirely different thing to actually consider others’ best interests. Either way, it won’t go unnoticed.

Don’t Overcompensate

A common ambition of parents during a divorce is to try to spoil your children into feeling better or “liking you more”. Not only is this not a good long-term strategy, but it will likely lead to unnecessary conflict.

Again, always question your own intentions before making decisions. However, this is often done unconsciously or with the sole desire of making the child feel better.

Nevertheless, you are still a parent and still one of the primary adults in the child’s life. For the sake of their development, you still need to act like a parent and try to provide them with the best childhood that you can.

It is perfectly okay to take your child out for ice cream and to have fun with them. However, showering them with unnecessary gifts and rewards because of your own guilt won’t help them, even if it feels right in the moment.

Instead, try to be present, honest, and genuine with your child at all times. That is what they need.

Take Care Of Yourself

Lastly, your child needs healthy parents. During your time alone, it’s important to ensure that you are remaining safe and healthy. There are many learning curves that come with divorce, like how to handle living alone.

We discussed a lot about taking care of your child, which is likely your top priority. However, that doesn’t mean you should sacrifice taking care of yourself.

Don’t Give Up!

Listen, divorce with children inevitably comes with bumps in the road. How you handle those bumps will determine how your child looks back at a large portion of their childhood. If you take anything away from this, always have the best of intentions for your child and try to work as a team. If you want to learn more about co-parenting, stay up to date with our latest news and contact us with any questions!

Divorce can happen for many reasons but no matter the cause, everyone struggles to deal with the emotions of separation.

Did you know that the most common cause of divorce is a lack of commitment? 

Even if you ended things naturally, there are still a lot of mixed emotions that come with getting a divorce and moving on from an ex-partner. You can feel sad, angry, confused, irritable, or even experience mental health problems.

The first step after divorce is coming to terms with what has happened. However, in order to do that, you need the right support network and tools.

Thankfully, you won’t need to look very far to find some advice and tips to help you come to terms with your divorce and build a new future. This article will give you everything you need.

Why Divorce Is Emotionally Challenging

It is no wonder that after divorce you are confronted with new challenges. That being said, emotions after divorce are not something you can prepare for. No one expects that when they get married they will separate.

But, it happens and many people are left alone trying to navigate their way around their new life. It is important to understand why you might be feeling uncertain, sad, or confused about what has happened. 

So, why is divorce emotionally challenging? 

Let’s start with the fact that you have just lost someone you loved. 

Letting Go

Love is a profound feeling and it sneaks upon us in the most unexpected ways. When you marry someone, you do not only move in together and set up a home, you merge two lives together and share everything. 

Your partner becomes your whole world, and then, suddenly, they are gone. And, the person you loved leaves an empty space behind. 

The feeling is similar to when you lose any loved one, no matter if that is a spouse, parent, or child. The pain and grief are the same. Sometimes, you will look back on the relationship with fondness.

Other times, you will feel angry and want to withdraw from everyone around you. All of these feelings are perfectly normal. 

Broken Family

Coping with divorce is hard enough between two partners, but most of the time, people who divorce also have children. Therefore, the separation is not just between a couple, but it ends in a broken family. 

Every parent wants their child to be happy and healthy, and they want to give them the best life possible. However, many parents feel guilty for not making their marriage work and therefore put the blame on themselves. 

This is particularly difficult when the children are young and cannot understand exactly what has happened. This can cause other problems for children adjusting to the new family system.

All you can do is help your child with the transition and talk to them openly about dealing with emotions after divorce. 

Unfulfilled Dreams

Popular culture such as movies, songs, and books convey love as an idealistic, magical experience.

Of course, that is true. It is a marvelous feeling to fall in love. Although, anyone who has fallen in love knows that in reality, being in a marriage is difficult. It requires two people to be open-minded and considerate. 

As well as mixed emotions after divorce, people are confronted with the fact that their dream life, dream person, and dream future has been changed. 

Plus, you need to think about how your future will turn out, make decisions for yourself, and get used to being alone for the first time, in possibly a long time. 

Now you might be wondering, how to cope with divorce, what you can do, and how to build a life after divorce.

Eight Tips to Help You Heal After Divorce

Learning how to cope with divorce is a complicated and intense process. You might be wondering how to split finances, organize co-parenting, and also how to manage your own emotions. 

In order for you to be there for your family and build a new life for yourself, you will need to prioritize looking after yourself. You will need to take time to process the divorce so you can move on fully. 

1) Be Gentle to Yourself

A breakup is tough emotionally, but a divorce is even harder. You might have been with someone for years, or maybe months, but the effects of getting divorced take a long time to get over. 

Instead of trying to ignore your feelings, pushing on with life, or repressing difficult emotions, you need to learn to be gentle to yourself. You need to allow yourself time to feel all the different emotions. 

Self-care and being compassionate to yourself is essential for coping with life after divorce, and it will help you handle all the other obstacles that come with it.  

2) Don’t Rush

As mentioned before, losing a loved one through a divorce means you’ll have to give yourself time to experience the grief. Divorce marks an end of a part of your life, and therefore you need to take your time saying goodbye. 

That might mean talking with your partner, journaling, or simply being alone and reflecting on your marriage. 

That being said, this process will look different to everyone, as everyone’s divorce ends differently. The most important thing is to remember both the good and bad parts of the relationship.

This will help you find closure and move on with your life. 

3) Think Positively

It can be easy to fall into the trap of viewing your divorce as a failure and maybe you have people around you who are judging you for your decision or criticizing the way you handled it. 

Ultimately, you do not need to justify the decision to anyone. Your marriage was between two people, and it does not mean that you failed because it didn’t work out. 

As well as this, divorce rates are even higher nowadays than they were in the past because society has changed and there is not the same pressure to settle down and have children with someone. 

To avoid feeling shame or negativity towards your marriage, you should try to have a positive outlook. This helps you think positively and accept what has happened. 

4) Surround Yourself With Happiness

After getting divorced, some people may feel lonely, depressed, and isolated from friends. This might be due to the fact that couples tend to form similar friendship groups, or you might want to withdraw from everyone else.

Not only this, but the process of getting divorced is tiring and it can get messy, especially if children are involved and you need to attend custody trials. 

Because of these reasons, you need to ensure that the people around you are good for you. This means you should think carefully about the people in your life and if they are supporting you during this time or making it worse.

This can be hard because you might not want to accept the idea that your close friends or family are affecting you negatively, but it is vital to your well-being that you are self-aware about your environment. 

It can be helpful to go to counseling, or another type of therapy if you feel that you are struggling with removing toxic people from your life. 

5) Reach Out to Friends

For any life change that someone goes through, it is crucial that you have supportive friends to lean on and comfort you. This is one of the most important ways to get through a divorce, talking and being with others.

However, you need to think carefully about who you confide in and make sure that they are trustworthy. This will become more important as the divorce becomes more permanent.

You will want someone you can rely on around you to help you with planning a move, a different job, or simply to sit with you and cry. Everyone needs help during these hard moments.

6) Build a Routine 

Once you have finalized the separation and decided on where you will be living, the next step is building your routine. After living with someone and merging your life with them, you will have to create a new routine. 

This tip is helpful for life in general, but it is particularly useful for people starting a new life after marriage. Routine can help you feel more grounded, in control, and safe. 

You will benefit from the consistency during a time that feels overwhelming and out of control. For instance, you can try a new hobby, go for a run, or set a new morning routine to start your day with positivity! 

7) Enjoy Being Single 

Being alone after marriage can be strange and you might feel an instinct to date again and meet someone new. That being said, it is healthy and beneficial to take some time alone.

It is a good way to process your feelings, and get used to your new living situation. In addition to this, you will learn to be confident by yourself, gain coping mechanisms, and enjoy doing things you love.

This is especially important if children are involved in your life. You do not want to change their environments even more. So, taking time away from dating is good for you and your children. 

8) Make the Most of Resources 

Thankfully, divorce can be made easier with the use of online tools and communities. For example, have you heard of 2houses? 

2houses is a wonderful online platform created to help divorced parents handle co-parenting and assist you in the practicalities of your new lives apart. 

How do they help?

They have tools to help you with organizing shared custody, finances, and other helpful software to make the transition as smooth and easy as possible for you and your family. 

Divorce doesn’t need to be stressful. If you have the right resources around you, it can be manageable for everyone involved. 

As well as 2houses, another great way to get support during a divorce is joining online chatrooms, groups, or book clubs where people discuss their own experiences and offer advice on different topics. 

This can be hugely helpful for those who are struggling with their separation and offers comfort in times of need. You don’t need to go through it all alone. 

Divorce is scary and often takes people by surprise, as no one thinks they will get separated when they first get married.

When the day comes when you decide to go separate ways with your partner, you might not know what to do or find it hard to create your identity after marriage. 

Finding Yourself After Divorce

To make sure that you don’t lose confidence or develop feelings of depression and anxiety, the best way to find yourself again is to connect with your passions and hobbies. 

This can be through taking online classes and developing a skill that you might never have had time to learn, or it could mean working towards being financially independent. 

After divorce, it is common to split finances until your partner is secure and fully independent from their spouse, so striving towards financial independence is a great way to create a new life for yourself. 

It also makes you feel empowered and confident for the future. This will make it easier going to events alone, making new friends, and living in your own home. 

It might take a while to get to a place where you are truly content, but it will happen. It will just take time and patience. 

Making Life Easy After Divorce

The last thing anyone needs after divorce is more stress due to organizing and planning the practical parts of a separation. To avoid this, 2houses is there to help! 

You no longer need to worry about sorting finances, planning custody dates, or messaging with your ex-spouse when you can do it all in one place. These tools are there to make life easier for you after divorce, not harder.

So, why not make the most of these resources? That way, you will be able to spend more time on yourself and work towards your new dream life! 

Reach out today to find out more! 

One of your worst nightmares has come true – you’re divorced and single again. On top of that, you’ve never felt more alone. We understand that such a feeling can leave you devastated and overwhelmed, but you need to be stronger than ever before. Perspective is everything, which is why you should see it as a new beginning rather than an ending and a failure. Lift your head up high and step confidently into the next chapter of your life. Check out our tips that will help you enjoy living alone after divorce.

Go back to your hobbies

When was the last time you took a brush and stood in front of your easel? Can you even remember how much time has passed since you read a book or enjoyed some of your other hobbies? If the answer is something along the lines of, I have no idea, it’s time you went back to your origins and start doing everything you used to enjoy. Sometimes being a couple leaves little time for your own passions, so now that you’re single again, you can go back to your hobbies and even consider new ones.

Develop new routines

You’ve probably thought about taking that cooking class for years back, but never had a strong will do to it. Whether because you were too busy being a spouse and a parent or because you thought you’d do it some other time, you allowed for the time to go by, and your desire to learn has eventually subsided. If being alone still doesn’t agree with you, surrounding yourself with people and developing new routines is the best strategy. After finishing a course, consider joining a club. Be it a book club or a divorced women’s society in the neighbourhood, opening up about your problems will be highly beneficial for you.

Redecorate your home for a new start

Leaving the past behind will allow you to look only forward and think about the present. One of the best ways to create a new beginning for you is to redecorate your home. From repainting the walls to changing the carpets, and some furniture, getting rid of all the décor that reminds you of your pre-divorce life will be the best move. Consider transforming the outdoors and add an extra layer of security with protective chain wire fencing that you’ll use to enclose your property. You can never be too safe from burglars, so invest in sturdy fencing solutions that will create a strong barrier against any intruders.

Travel alone for new experiences

You only live once, so you better make it count. Have you ever considered travelling to a new destination on your own? If you used to fear travelling by yourself, there’s no better time than now to face your fears and overcome them. Book a ticket to the place you’ve always wanted to go to and embrace new possibilities. Travelling alone doesn’t have to be scary, as long as you follow some of the basic rules that will keep you safe when touring by yourself.

Accept the fact that you as an individual are enough

This may be the most challenging task of all, but it’s, nevertheless, vital for your emotional recovery and growth. Accepting yourself as a complete individual even when you don’t have a life partner next to you is of the essence. Just because your marriage didn’t work doesn’t mean that you’re destined to be forever alone. Furthermore, living by yourself will be therapeutic and allow you to create a more meaningful relationship with yourself. That is much more important than having a strong connection to your romantic partner. Only after you’ve accepted yourself as being enough will you be able to offer the best of you to another person. Gove yourself more credit and be proud of your strength. Going through a divorce isn’t easy, and you’ve survived getting out of it stronger than ever.

Loving yourself even after your partner has left is vital for your survival. You must learn to be by yourself, to go through this troublesome period. It won’t be easy, but with the tips we’ve listed, you’ll find your way towards healing and new opportunities, much faster.

If you’re going through a divorce right now, you know how stressful it is. It awakens the feelings of loneliness, disappointment, depression and anger, and when you’re pumped up with emotions like that, it’s hard to stay professional and handle all your work tasks. So how can you finalize and mourn your divorce while also fulfilling all your work duties? It’s hard but possible, especially if you follow these tips below:

Talk to your boss

You might not want to share your personal life with colleagues, but since your productivity will almost certainly suffer a bit due to divorce, it’s important to talk to your boss. Your boss might be able to help you through this time—many people are surprised how understanding managers and CEOs can be. Be open in your discussion and you’ll build more trust with the corporate and know that you can always count on the support of your superiors.

Turn off your phone

You don’t have to be available to your ex or their lawyers 24/7. Unless there’s an emergency with the kids or house, it’s a good idea to block the calls until you finish work. And that includes texts and emails as well. Once you step into your office, you need to commit the next 6-8 hours to your job and leave your private life for later. Texts and phone calls from the ex, friends and family can completely ruin your day and occupy every part of your brain. While you’re at work, you need to focus on it and not let unexpected arguments steal your motivation and productivity.

Make a good schedule

Divorce often makes people feel very defeated and lonely. You have to fight the tendency to give up and isolate yourself. A good way to handle your personal crisis and keep productivity high is by making a clear schedule of your days so you can check off tasks as they come.  Make a list of a few things that need to be finished such as picking up kids, buying groceries, calling business partners, preparing a presentation for tomorrow, and making sure you can tick them off (finishing tasks and ticking them off can be very fulfilling.) Also, don’t forget to schedule some you-time so you can let out some steam. Oftentimes, a short 20-minute workout or even a 10-minute walk can feel refreshing for your brain and give you clarity.

Take good care of your health

It’s easy to neglect your health during this hard time but make sure to follow a good diet and stay hydrated. If you eat three meals a day, expect to be energized and healthy and have a stable mood (the latter is something you desperately need right now). It’s understandable that you’re not leading the healthiest life right now, especially if your ex used to cook every day or you two had a habit of meeting for lunch, but if you get sick, it will be even harder to handle your divorce. When you need some extra help with hydration, it’s a good idea to reach for nootropic smart drinks which use Ginko, GABA, Huperzine-A and other substances to boost productivity and focus and ensure more restful sleep—just what you need right now. Plus, they provide proper hydration.

Find a safe space

Every time you feel overwhelmed at work, make sure to take a break. Identify your safe space and visit it whenever you need to rest. People can recharge their batteries by going for a short walk, getting a cup of coffee or listening to some music in your car. Some people choose to take on more work to provide them with a distraction, but burying yourself in your work is not a great way to cope.

Reorganize your desk

There are many things that remind you of your soon-to-be-ex partner at home, but at work as well. You probably keep a few things at your desk that remind you of them—holiday photos, small souvenirs that you bought together, fun memories, etc. The way you organize your things might even remind you of the routines you had during your past life. To make things easier for yourself, it’s smart to reorganize your desk and make a new setting. A change of scenery will remove painful memories and even boost your productivity.

Prepare an answer to everyone’s questions

Unless you’re completely new to your workplace, your coworkers will most likely see that you’re off your game. Expect a few questions, so have an answer ready if you don’t want to get into it. “I’m going through something at home. Thank you for your concern, I’ll be fine soon”. It’s nice to know people care, but you don’t have to discuss your personal life with anyone.

Oftentimes, a divorce can positively affect your career, but not at the beginning. While you’re going through the roughest patch, it’s important to stay focused, calm and professional, so your career can bloom once everything starts returning to normal.

Every year, domestic violence wreaks havoc on the lives of an estimated four million people – the vast majority of whom are women, but men also make up a significant percentage of that statistic. In addition to this, it’s important to point out that domestic abuse also has a substantial ripple effect on entire families and friendship groups, causing distress and trauma to those close to the abuse.

If you find yourself in the unfortunate situation of being a victim of domestic abuse, you may be considering a divorce from your partner. After all, domestic violence can affect mental health and physical health, as well as cause significant harm and even death in extreme situations. With that said, here is a quick run-through of everything you need to know about divorcing an abusive spouse.

What Are the Types of Abuse In a Marriage?

First and foremost, it is critical to understand the various forms of marital abuse. Unfortunately, many individuals believe that physical violence is the only way their spouse may harm them, but this is simply not true. The following are some of the most prevalent kinds of abuse in abusive relationships:

• Physical abuse
• Emotional and verbal abuse
• Sexual abuse
• Financial abuse
• Digital abuse
• Stalking

How Spousal Abuse Might Affect the Type of Divorce You Choose?

Typically, there are two types of divorce that you need to be aware of; these are no-fault and fault-based. Divorcing spouses under certain state laws have the choice of seeking a fault-based divorce, but in others, all divorces are classed as no-fault. It all depends on the laws within your area.

No-Fault Divorce

The filing spouse in a no-fault divorce is seeking a divorce based on one of the state’s no-fault legal grounds. In most states, these legal grounds are usually separation, irreconcilable differences, irreversible breakdown, and incompatibility. To have a claim for a no-fault divorce accepted by the court, the filing spouse does not have to allege that there has been any marital abuse. Instead, the spouse must simply inform the court that the marriage has ended and that there is nothing that can be done to save it through things such as counseling, etc. After this, the court will grant the divorce if both spouses fulfill the state’s other divorce standards.

Fault-Based Divorce

A fault-based divorce, on the other hand, requires the filing spouse to launch allegations that there are more specific legally recognized grounds for the divorce. Adultery, abuse, criminal convictions, and substance addiction are just a few of the common reasons for fault-based divorces. As for domestic abuse, you can claim in your divorce papers that your marriage ended because of your spouse’s abuse, giving details where necessary.

How Spousal Abuse Affects Financial Outcomes After a Divorce

Of course, it goes without saying that the financial aspect of a divorce is one of the most significant. In many cases, this can be the primary factor that causes abused spouses to remain in the marriage without seeking a divorce, as they are fearful they will be cut off and left without any assets, possessions, or cash.

To be frank, it’s impossible to offer a blanket response about how funds will be handled after a divorce because each case is unique. With that stated, marital abuse can have an impact on property distribution, especially if the spouse who has been abused can prove that it has resulted in financial losses or a reduction in their capacity to generate income. Domestic violence victims with additional financial concerns tend to be treated more leniently by the courts, sometimes offering alimony to those who need financial support.

How Spousal Abuse Affects Child Custody After a Divorce

If you have children, you may be anxious about how the courts will handle custody. In every state, the court will examine what will be the best outcome for the child. If you can show that you have been the victim of domestic abuse, the courts may place restrictions on your abusive spouse’s custody rights, such as restricting overnight visits. In severe situations, a court may terminate their right to visitation and give you complete custody, but this, too, is contingent on the facts of your case.

Above all, the most crucial consideration is your safety. If you believe you are a victim of domestic violence, get help right away so you can protect yourself and your children. Once you are safe, then you can start to consider moving through with the divorce.

Relationships are one of the essential parts of your life due to constant support and emotional understanding. But, things can go wrong and take a drastic turn soon after uttering “I do.” You may experience anxious thoughts and racing hearts quite often after your divorce. Also, it can affect your social skills and lead to mental issues. Such after-divorce effects might hinder your daily life and call for adequate protective measures. You must sit back and find out the effective ways to deal with the stress and live a happy life.

1.  Normalize The Mixed Feelings

Do you feel anxious and exhausted at one time and aggressive and heated at the next? Mixed feelings are pretty standard, especially after breaking ties with your partner. Venturing into the unknown without any support system by your side can be frightening. Also, it induces a sense of doubt about your capabilities and makes you feel vulnerable. You need to accept the mixed feelings and normalize the thousands of thoughts you experience. Try to let the thoughts flow without reacting to them. That way, you realize that these mixed feelings are temporary and better days await ahead.

While identifying your present emotions, you must try and make more room for positive feelings. Know that life has so much more to offer than just a life partner and a happy married life. Along with this, stay open to the unknown and let life guide you through these times. In case the stress takes over your mind and becomes unbearable, you can always resort to cbdMD for some calming CBD supplements.

2.  Practice Self Care

During the moving on phase, even the normal tasks like waking up and taking a shower can be a lot to do. You may feel like lying on the bed and doing nothing for the entire day. But, try to understand that doing absolutely nothing is harmful to your body and your mind. You need to take care of yourself and practice self-care habits. Whether it’s a nice and warm bubble bath or your favorite cup of coffee on the bed, every little habit makes you feel better.

Hence, you must nurture your body and do the things you love. Take out a few minutes to read a self-help book with the sunset right in front. Or, maybe you can prep your skin with some herbal skincare products. Eat healthy and nutrient-packed foods to rejuvenate your mind and beat the negativity. Living an everyday life and keeping yourself busy at times can be the best stress-buster. Also, understand your worth and start a new journey at this point in life.

3.  Don’t Make Abrupt Decisions.

A life crisis predisposes you to unwanted emotions and constant adrenaline surge. While moving on from the pain of divorce, you must refrain from making some life-changing decisions. Constant emotional disturbance can affect your decision-making abilities and cognition. Further, you might end up doing something that isn’t good for your future self. Try to make decisions after proper analysis and estimation of the future outcomes. That way, you can weigh all your options and make rational decisions.

Always go after practicality and logic for long-term benefits. Decisions driven by emotions are likely to backfire and cause more harm than good.

4.  Let Go

If you can’t control a situation, then you shouldn’t spend even a minute overthinking about it. One of the best ways to deal with separation stress is to let go and quit overthinking. You must utilize the time to find out what’s best for you and your future. Also, try to stay away from negative assumptions and quit overthinking the uncontrollable. Such habits can help you tackle these difficult times and curb stress. Apart from this, you need to step back and say no to any arguments with your ex-partner. While moving on from the relationship takes time, communicating with your ex over the irreparable stuff worsens it. Get some mental clarity and remind yourself not to look back.

Do your best to secure a promising future and take the past incidents as a lifelong lesson. All these measures can help in letting go and venturing into the mysterious life ahead.

5.  Exercise Daily

Another essential habit of incorporating into your life is an exercise routine. Staying active can reduce the levels of stress hormones like adrenaline and cortisol. Also, it contributes to a sense of accomplishment, nurtures your body, and limits negative emotions. Separation predisposes you to uncontrollable anger, aggression, and irritability. In such cases, you need a sweat-drenching workout to uplift your mood and stay positive.

Research suggests that exercise is the best way to deal with mental issues like anxiety and depression. Don’t forget to start with the beginner’s workout routine and deal with the mixed emotions like a pro.

Final Words

Divorce is the last thing that any couple wants to go through after tying the knots. Also, it can be quite stressful to deal with due to anxious thoughts and a feeling of vulnerability. If you’re unable to deal with the pain of separation, you must find out effective tips to tackle the issues. Start with understanding your emotions and make more room for positive ones. Also, you can practice self-care habits like reading books or taking a hot shower when you feel stressed. Include more movement in your routine to release stress and negative emotions.

Co-parenting isn’t always smooth for everyone. Each co-parenting dynamic is different for each set of parents, meaning some situations are more challenging to navigate than others. Although disagreements over scheduling or subtle tension between yourself and your ex-partner may not seem like a big deal at first, constantly dealing with that underlying stress can take a significant toll on your mental health.

As June is Men’s Health Month, it’s essential to bring awareness to all aspects of men’s health, including mental well-being. Keep reading to learn more about how dads can stay mentally strong when co-parenting. But first, let’s take a look at the connection between men and mental well-being.

Men and Mental Health

Although society is making more ground in the mental health space, there is still a lot of work to be done. Stigmas surrounding mental health, especially for men, are still very prevalent. A lot of it stems from the assumption that “masculine” men shouldn’t ask for help and handle things independently. To ask for help is perceived as “weak.” Due to this stereotype, amongst many others, men are less likely to schedule doctor’s appointments. According to a survey done by Cleveland Clinic, 72 percent of men would rather do household chores, like cleaning the bathroom or mowing the lawn, than go to the doctor.

This is a problem as you cannot always deal with specific physical or mental health issues on your own. Consulting a trusted medical professional to help you develop a plan of action can help you address and sort out whatever is ailing you. Taking care of your mental health is extremely important if you have children seeing as it can affect everything from their development to their own mental health.

How Mental Health Affects The Kids

Mood Issues

It’s a common saying that kids are like sponges, and that isn’t necessarily wrong. Kids, especially young ones, soak up a lot of what their parents say and do, as well as how they feel. If you’re struggling mentally, whether you mean to or not, you may be passing your struggles off unknowingly on to your child. While mental disorders are not contagious, that doesn’t mean your child’s mood may not take a hit. Being around a parent who isn’t functioning at full capacity because of mental health struggles isn’t easy on anyone, let alone the child. Being with someone through the ups and downs of their health can be very taxing and affect their own mental health as long-term stress is usually a catalyst.

Behavioral Problems

A CDC article states that at least 1 in 4 children have a caregiver with mental health difficulties, meaning kids are more exposed to mental health issues than people may realize. If your child is acting out, it may be a result of your poor mental health. The helplessness children feel when they cannot help their parents, who are struggling mentally, can sometimes feel consuming and make them wonder what they’re doing wrong. Constantly feeling like things are out of their control or believing that they are the cause of your mental distress can result in them acting in ways that they normally would not.

How Mental Health Affects You

Your Self-Esteem

Mental health and self-esteem sometimes go hand in hand. When you’re dealing with bipolar disorder, anxiety, or depression, it’s common for negative thoughts to take over. As a dad, you may feel like you aren’t being a good enough parent or feel like you’re not good enough in general. Thoughts and feelings like this only serve to make your mental well-being worse, creating a cycle of negativity. Not only does stress affect the emotional side of things, but it can also affect more minor things that impact your self-esteem, like your hair, skin, and overall body image. For many, their appearance is their primary source of confidence, and when things are off, it can really affect you. Self-esteem and confidence issues can cause eating disorders, unhealthy lifestyle choices, and more.

Higher Risk For Disease

Mental illness is also usually a result of long periods of stress without reprieve during that time. This can put you at a higher risk of developing diseases like high blood pressure, diabetes, and heart disease since excessive stress is linked to a variety of health problems. If these problems are left unchecked, they can severely impact your quality of life causing you not to be able to function on the level that you’d like. Additionally, those who struggle with mental health may have a higher likelihood of turning to unhealthy outlets such as drugs and alcohol. This only serves to make matters worse as vices like alcohol worsen mood and health over time and only provide monetary satisfaction. This also won’t help your co-parenting situation, as excessive alcohol use is not conducive to a healthy home environment for your child.

Affects Co-Parenting

Mental health symptoms in men don’t always look like what is deemed “common” symptoms. For example, men who experience conditions like depression are often aggressive, angry, and/or irritable. While your mental health battles may cause your mood to fluctuate, your ex-partner may not know that. To them, you may seem like you’re in a never-ending bad mood, which can cause tension between the two of you. Tension often leads to a disagreement which isn’t ideal for people in a co-parenting relationship since you want to provide a healthy environment for your child or children. With that being said, while you don’t need to tell your ex-partner what you’re going through specifically, you still need to hold yourself accountable. If you are acting unlike yourself or feeling more irate than normal and it’s affecting your ability to co-parent, it’s your job to take the steps necessary to get the help you need.

Take Some Time

It won’t hurt to take some time for yourself every now and then. Many parents feel guilty when they’re spending time on or with their children, but they shouldn’t. Self-care is an integral part of overall wellness, including mental health. Sometimes your everyday life stressors like co-parenting can feel overwhelming, and you may need a break from it. On one of your off days away from your child, schedule some “me” time. Me time can mean a range of things and can be anything that you want. Men tend to shy away from self-care because of the notion that it’s all facials and bath bombs, however, it is not. While that may be self-care to some, it’s not what it has to look like for you. Your self-care day may look like taking a scenic drive or picking yourself up some of your favorite restaurant food. No matter what it is, take joy in doing something that is stress-free. This will give you much-needed time to rejuvenate before you see your child again.

Solutions To Try

Seeing as sometimes co-parenting may involve custody hearings, making sure your mental health is in optimal condition is essential. You need to show that you are mentally fit enough to take care of your child, so if co-parenting is the source of your mental distress, you should try and rectify the situation sooner rather than later.

Let It Go

A lot of the time, the tension between two parents comes from their previous relationship with each other. Depending on what happened, it can sometimes be hard to move on from situations despite having a child with that person. Every time you see them it can bring forward a bunch of emotions that you may not want to think about. However, sometimes releasing that anger or hurt is the best thing for you. Holding onto those negative feelings can lead to resentment building within the relationship, which doesn’t help you. It can be damaging to your mental well-being and it isn’t good for your child to see, hear or feel constant tension between you and your ex-partner. While it may be easier said than done to start things fresh, you should try to make an effort for your child. Because the most important thing is making sure your child has the best upbringing that they possibly can.

Talk Your Ex-Partner

This can mean a lot of different things depending on your situation. If you currently have a strenuous relationship with your ex-partner, try talking things out with them and coming to a truce. Don’t underestimate the power of a respectful and level-headed conversation. If you think you’re going to struggle to have a decent conversation with your ex-partner, consider getting a third party involved. A mediator can help you to have a productive conversation, and get things on the right track. Alternatively, if you still don’t want to see your ex-partner, you may benefit from tools that help separated parents communicate without being in-person to help mitigate potential problems. Aside from that, talking to your co-parent may also mean divulging when you need help. If you’re having a difficult time and need some time to work things out, let your ex-partner know so you can both come up with a plan that works best for your child.

Gain Confidence

Regain confidence in yourself and your parenting skills. With a lot of aspects of self-esteem, you have to remind yourself that you’re trying your best and that you are enough. Whether this means thinking positively about your parenting abilities or your overall life, make sure you remember the good you’re doing. Also, don’t forget to gain confidence in other aspects of your life too, since it can increase overall happiness. Struggling with your physical appearance can have a toll on your confidence, which can affect your overall well-being, so don’t let your insecurities run the show. Take charge and reinvent yourself. That new suit you wanted? Buy it and walk around confidently. Are you tired of your hair or lack thereof? Go to a salon or use a hair loss treatment to help make you feel like a new person. Whatever it may be, make sure you’re doing things that make you happy and gaining that confidence back to be the best parent you can be.

See A Therapist

Going to see a therapist is highly stigmatized. A lot of times people feel shameful if they seek out professional help as if there’s something wrong with it—there isn’t. Taking care of your mental health should never feel shameful or embarrassing. It will only serve to help improve your relationship with your ex-partner and better the upbringing for your child and that’s the most important thing. If you’ve never been to a therapist before, make sure you do your research. You want to make sure you’re going to someone who is professional and has your best interest at heart. Also, don’t feel as if you have to stay with one of your first, second, or even third therapist. You can switch as many times as you’d like until you find the right one.

Final Thoughts

Never be afraid to tell someone you trust about what you’re going through, no matter how big or small it may seem. Letting things out and letting someone know that you’re struggling is one of the best things you can do for your mental health. Sometimes all you need is a listening ear and someone to say that they understand. If you aren’t comfortable talking to a professional or a loved one, consider reaching out to an online support group to talk to people going