The security blanket, first companion of your child!

security blanket - 2houses

Teddy bear, doll, end of colored tissue, old tee-shirt of mom or dad or a sheet, a cover blanket, only one or several security blankets, with sometimes improbable odors because they were handled and sucked, here is the universe of the security blankets of our children!

Whatever its shape, the security blanket is the best friend of our children. It gets a psychological comfort and has a particular emotional value.

True companion of the child, the security blanket is symbolic, reassuring and therapeutic.

The children are very attached and carry it during nap, unhappiness, anxiety or tiredness. The security blanket is present everywhere!

The choice of the security blanket

It is the child who chooses the security blanket, and it will become irreplaceable, because it is made by memories…He will also choose the elements and characteristics, which will enable him to be reassured: colors, textures, forms and odors…

What symbolizes the security blanket?

Very small, the child needs to feel safe and will stick to an object or a security blanket around 8 months, age which coincides with what is more commonly called as “the separation anxiety of the 8th month”.

Key stage in the development of the child, this one understands that an object not seen is not any more one disappeared object… and accepts that the person who left him or her, dad or mom, always exist but are not there…

Moments of fear and of anxiety appear, the child feeling the need to comfort himself with an object which reassures, makes safe, and which helps to make the transition between the presence of their “parents present” and “parents absent”: mom, dad, or all people who are present in the closed environment to the child in a daily way.

The security blanket is also used to help the child to cope with situations such as the arrival at the nursery, the first steps at school, the holiday departure, a day or a weekend with the grandparents, or the separation or the divorce of their parents.

Until which age the child needs a security blanket?

Most of the time, it is the child himself who will decide to part from its security blanket.

Thus no prerequisite age! When the security blanket is not essential any more, becoming then a trophy, put in the bedroom of the children and will always guard a place of choice in their hearts. The need to have a security blanket becomes blurred towards the age of 6-7 years old.

And you? What does look like the security blanket of your child??

When your child decided to part from his/her security blanket?

Tell us and leave us your comments here.

 

 

5 tricks to make a success of your evening of Halloween!

halloween - 2houses

You want to spend a terrifying evening with your families and close relationships?

Halloween is coming! On Thursday, October 31st, 2013, it will be the opportunity to celebrate Halloween!

In your diaries and do not forget to register this event in your calendar!

Small reminder on the origin of Halloween

Halloween is celebrated at the night of October 31st. From Celtic tradition, celebrated in most of countries of the world, it is of Christian origin and is a event allowing to close the past year and to celebrate the passage of the new year which begins.

The word “Halloween” comes from the contraction of “All Hallow Even”, meaning the evening of all the saints, which corresponds on the eve of the Western Christian feast, the All Saint’s day.

This party is also the opportunity of having fun, by frightening, with enjoyment and good mood, but it is also a sharing and conviviality moment for parents and children, by disguising as wizards, witches, ghosts, zombies, vampires or other malefic creatures …

Other enjoyments of Halloween’s party: decorating the house and preparing the famous pumpkins of Halloween, and do not forget to make reserves of candies for the children!

Here are in some stages, the keys of success to celebrate this magic night!

  • Organize a disguised evening under the theme of Halloween and invite your close relationships and families
  • Define the theme of your Halloween party ! It will be the occasion to organize an unique party and will help you on the choice of decorations and food!
  • Liven up your party, by organizing a competition of the best fancy disguises of Halloween, by proceeding to a vote during the evening party!
  • Decorate your party and be creative! with a disturbing and black atmosphere, with plastic spiders, deaths’ heads, phosphorescent cobwebs, phials, sculptures of pumpkins, or more magic atmosphere with fairy lights and pumpkin lanterns that you will have dug with your children, to place candles. Share the pictures of your children’s disguises in your journal
  • Propose an original menu with Halloween’s colours, with magic and terrifying dishes and drinks, delicious pumpkin juices, or transparent and smoking drinks in the atmosphere of Frankenstein, soups of toads and spinaches, red and black dishes, covered by “blood”, and cakes in the shape of pumpkins

Shyness: a curse or a wonderful talent?

shyness - 2houses

Shyness is not a definition but rather a description, behind which as many stories hides… Shyness is a belief, which feeds itself as a snake, eating its tail. When we do not believe in shyness any more, it ends up disappearing.

It is neither a character trait, nor a sign of personality and even less a fate. Between stimulating stress and paralyzing anxiety, the pallet of timidity is very varied.

In certain cases, it can become a true social handicap, a brake with the life, because the shy person is entitled neither right to speak nor right to watch.

Shyness can be a social timidity and then relates to timidity in the social interactions affecting the social instinct, but it can be of loving origin, and refers specifically to the difficulties encountered with the opposite sex, in seduction relationships.

In case of a tragic event, such as the loss of an employment, the loss of a expensive being, a separation or a divorce, we lose a part of ourselves, with the feeling of loss of self-confidence, return on oneself, anguish and timidity.

The shy person organizes its life in order to avoid criticisms and remarks, sometimes destroying: restaurants, coffee bars, stores are prohibited, any public space is not authorized to him and timidity is right of him. All its good intentions one thousand times reformulated could nothing make and the shy person is traumatized.

Thousand tricks and tips can be implemented to flat the bars of this invisible prison…

  • Be not shamed of your shyness. Assume it! The less you think of it, the more you have chances to remove it!
  • Be not afraid of the judgment of others. You have to accept the critics in order to progress.
  • Speaking about your shyness to your friends, by explaining them what you are feeling. It will allow you to feel less alone.
  • Practising a sport, participating to a cultural activity. It will allow you to overcome your shyness by integrating you into a group.
  • Following theatre courses, or public speeches groups courses
  • Assert yourselves in daring to say no and create the contact if possible
  • Be positive. Feel reassured and say to yourselves that you cost not less than the others, than you are able to be a positive person!
  • Do not hesitate to contact a therapist who can allow you to become emancipated
  • Participating to workshops or public speaking groups dedicated to the topic of shyness

http://centremergences.be

Dating after a divorce?

dating after divorce

Living a divorce is hard to everyone concerned by the situation, and looking for love after a separation or a divorce is sometimes a little bit tricky especially after spending many years with someone…

Divorce changes everything in your life!

You begin to doubt yourself in everything you do, which could lead you to depression and anxiety.

Divorcing can sometimes destroy your ability to trust again and depriving you of the opportunity to find that special someone.

This is the most fundamental problem that most divorced people undergo, and to learn how to get over the whole ordeal in order for you to live the life you truly deserve.

And now, a new life begins…

You are divorced, the papers are signed and you are quit with the lawyers’ payments and now your husband or your wife is your ex.

But you can ask yourself about how long do you want to stay single? Should you date with someone because your ex is? Do you want to remain single for the benefit of your kids?

Where do you find a new partner?

You are entering in a new phase of your life, it is a new beginning and it is also the opportunity to go out and create new relationships.

In order to find this new and great relationship with a woman or with a man, you must to “reenter” into the world of dating.

But before beginning to date, you need to accept that you are not married anymore.

In order to come back in the « world of dating », some advices can help you to make a successful date!

Read more on Metro UK

Maintaining an effective communication with your children after a divorce

effective communication - 2houses

Divorced parents communication is highly important as it has the highest purpose: the well being of the children.

Every time you contact your ex-partner, resolve to conduct yourself with class as your behavior might affect the situation of your children.

They are the focal point in every discussion as divorced parents, no matter what. It is a huge challenge that faces a parent after a divorce, in order to maintain a good and peaceful communication with your children!

After a divorce, emotions run high for children and parents.

Communication is important because children ask a lot of questions, so you should show and tell your children the love you have for them, and you have to know how your children are feeling.

Feelings of anger, betrayal and sadness can disrupt the communication process between the parents and their children, making major parenting decisions difficult and leaving children stuck in the middle. Each of these emotions needs to be recognized, accepted as real, communicated and discussed between parent and child. Youngsters need to feel free to ex­press these feelings within the family.

Setting reasonable boundaries can become the best line of defense, both for children and parents to reach a new equilibrium and to take into account that the youngsters feel more stable.

Life is to be lived with joy, and your children will be inspired by your positive attitude.

Hereunder, you will find some recommendations that can help you to encourage a positive and constructive communication with your children! 

Read more on Huffingtonpost.com